Four or Five?

Sometime ago, one of my acquaintances asked me this:

“Do you know how many horses are tied to the chariot driven by Krishna during the Mahabharata war?”

“Five” , I said.

“No, it is only four” he showed the ISKCON Bhagavad Gita.

ISKCON’ s Gita is the most popular one around the world, it seems, I don’t know. Some people say it is the authentic one, well I doubt. Gita by them contained only four horses. Even for a Hindu, if this is confusing what about others who try to understand Gita?

How many Hindus themselves understand what that picture means?

A major thing which is common with scriptures of all religion is that, they are not direct and simple. It mostly speaks through symbols. Thus just because a person can read and write dose not mean that he/she can understand a scripture. I think this is applicable to Bhagavad Gita, Holy Bible, Holy Quran, Holy Toras etc…

And that is why we need somebody to explain those. And since it not being direct, it can be interpreted in many ways. Jesus conveyed many things through fables. That further should be studied and understood. Those weren’t some kids stuff.

Well, the question is four horses or five.

First of all we need to understand what that chariot is. It is not just Lord Krishna driving a silly Chariot with some horses. Everything is in symbols.

That whole thing symbolizes ‘us’, a typical human

The Chariot is the Body
Krishna is the Driver which again means wisdom
The harness held by Krishna is mind
Horses are our FIVE sense organs

The whole thing is deep again and hence needs further analysis and explanation (since the question is number of horses…..hmmm…let me skip that)

So, it is five itself, five horses.

But why then it is told as four in many versions? Is that wrong? Not at all….that too is right

These organs deal with – sound, touch, taste, vision, and smell.

Some people club touch (skin) and taste (tongue) together since tongue is also sort of skin, externally. Tongue uses the skin layer to help taste (am not talking the science part)

(Why the horses are white? Why Krishna’s Conch called by that name, why Arjuna’s Conch called by that name, why that flag with Hanuman? Etc etc …..all these have some logic and they are not just a shown there for beauty of the picture)

Sometimes !

Sometimes I don’t understand you
You looked at me with eyes of kindness
You looked at me with eyes of cuteness
I looked at you with eyes of fear, coz
Sometimes I don’t understand you

You did not take me anywhere
But you took me all around
You walked ahead without looking at me, behind
I never knew where I go, coz
Sometimes I don’t understand you

Where is love and where is the heart?
I saw the heart in you I saw the love in you
You looked at me with eyes of fury
You looked at me with eyes of anger
Sometimes I don’t understand you

You stared at me you smiled at me
You did not give anything for me
Then you gave everything for me
I looked at you with eyes of puzzle, coz
Sometimes I don’t understand you

Sometimes I don’t understand you, coz
Sometimes I don’t understand you.

No Taido !

I was bit busy with some other preoccupied things for the last couple of days.

I got a comment and a mail regarding my post related to Taido. The mail does not need any attention since it was an appreciation. Thanks for the mail and comment. I expressed my view or ignorance and others have right to express theirs, with the same logic.

Since I have got friends and relatives in many parts of the world (which includes the U.S and Japan), I have other source than just browsing the net. The very best example is one of my friends providing information about Capoeira, from Brazil.

In any case, I don’t have any particular personal credentials with respect to any form of martial arts. Nor am I a martial arts historian.

(But I was lucky enough to get a kick from our national champion (of one time and of course I fell down) and be a student (for sometime) of a martial artist who then held a 6th Dan Black Belt).

My intention never was to tell that that Taido just copied something from Kalari and thus tarnish the image of Taido. Can I perform some moves of Taido and show the similarity with Kalari? I never said that.

Look at this situation, my Karate master developed some moves of his own (this is for real, he did that). But though he is my master, I won’t agree if he says it is his unique moves. Coz, all his base is his Karate and it originated from his exposure to it.

As far as Kalari is concerned, I was lucky to get acquainted with two of our State/Province champions. How long does it takes to master Karate and get a Black Belt? Below four years, if you are regular and has aptitude. And what about Kalari? When will you master it, in the traditional way? It takes about 10 years! (12 to 14 years, sometimes, even if you are regular and have got aptitude). Kalari can not be easily compared with modern Martial arts like Karate why because they have different approach.

Somebody who is an expert in Kalari is capable of making any move which is possible with a human body. Its emphasis on eye-mind-body co-ordination is very high. It makes you capable of moving the body (hand or legs) where the mind demands/requires it should go/reach. It meets demands of the situation - 100 %

Kalari not only address the defense, attack self discipline etc etc , but it has got a complete idea about the human body. Systematic treatment of injury is part of it (herb based). When combined with traditional Ayurveda, it can even address any form of human disease/illness/injury (from fracture to dandruff !!)

I remember some incidents during my training period. Accidents/injuries happening during training. My Kalari teacher handled it all by himself with his own medicines/techniques and in the second case (Karate), the victim was taken to a hospital for treatment (plus I have personal injury-doc visit experience). That makes a lot of difference. Today, in some Kalaries, many people from all over the world come for treatments for various ailments and rejuvenation.

A well accomplished Kalari Ashan ( a Kalari Teacher) knows what happens when a particular ‘vital point’ of Marma, gets hit. He knows when this person will die with what symptoms, if not treated. He is very much capable telling which part got hit looking at the symptoms and take appropriate action. I have seen them giving minor anesthesia by giving just a tap, as part of treatment. Kalari is not just another martial art; it’s a way of living.

Anybody who has looked into the history of martial arts knows who Bodhidharma is and what was his contribution to martial arts forms of Asia and from where he came from and what his base was.

Capoeira is unique in its own way since music is part and parcel of it. And its moves are different from the traditional left-right-front-back moves. And yes, it looks like they have the three dimensional moves. And it is more original than new brands of Karate with a different name.

Jeet Kune Do has nothing to do with Kung Fu? Aikido?.......

I don’t have any disrespect towards any form of martial arts found in any part of the world. In fact I love them. I respect them. And I am not ‘over proud’/prejudiced of my country’s martial arts. I am not at all partial about it, even I chose Karate over it.

But how many people now know Kalari, in its depth and originality? It did not develop or spread further but went the other way, unfortunately.

Taido

From childhood, I always wished to learn Karate. Though my place is the birth place of the mother of all martial arts, the Kalari Payattu’. Karate had some ‘style’. Kalari Payattu was too traditional. But my dad never allowed me to learn. He did not give me a proper reason for it. May be he was scared that I will get killed or something. And there were some people who spread this kind of message ‘ if you want to join Karate, you need to give a declaration saying even if you die while learning, they are not responsible’

How true it is? Partly it is true, coz, I signed a similar condition where it said, I am learning it at my own risk.

My first attempt to learn any martial art was about 20 years ago. When I become of age, I just joined a ‘Kalari’ – a school that teach Kalari Payattu – and started learning Kalari Payattu. My dad did not show much resistance, mom said, better you don’t come here receiving all the kicks and punches. But it was part of learning any martial arts.

I stopped it before me becoming good at it, after learning it for some months when my martial arts teacher shifted the Kalari to a far away place. Then there was a huge gap of 10 years, and I finally joined a Dojo to learn Karate.

Oooops! My intention wasn’t to write about my learning of martial arts....

I was about to write something else…something about a martial art form which is not that popular in my country or even most of the other countries (though it is practiced in Japan, Sweden, Finland, Portugal, Denmark, France, Great Britain, the Netherlands, Australia and the USA)…….. It is called Taido, and some even call it as the martial art of the 21st century.

Many of us are familiar (heard about) with most popular martial art forms like:

Boxing, Karate, Kung Fu, Taekwondo, Muay Thai, Judo, Ju Jitsu, Aikido, capoeira etc etc. but most of the people I know, don’t have any idea about Taido.

Taido originated in Japan, just like Karate. Founded by Seiken Shukumine about 40 years ago and it is based on Okinawan Karate . The major change (The usual moves are left, right , back front one) he made into his new form of martial art was the introduction of ‘three dimensional’ moves. This is implemented by spinning and twisting moves.

But all these moves are there in Kalari Payattu, which originated thousands of years ago. So back to basics?

The Preacher

Today I am going to tell a story. A Mulla Nasruddin Story


The old preacher of the neighboring town breathed his last. So, after his death, the people there told Mulla to preach for them.

“I am too tired, please find someone else” said the Mulla

But the crowd compelled him and took him to the dais. Looking at the audience Mulla asked,

“ Do you all know what I am going to speak?”

“Yes”, cheered the crowd.

“As you already know of it, I don’t have to speak” , said Mulla

But the crowd did not leave him.

“We don’t know what you are going to speak, so please speak’, they requested.

“When you don’t know, what is the use of me speaking?” , Mulla asked

Then half the crowd said they know and the other half said they didn’t know what he was going to speak.

So Mulla said to them:

‘In that case, those who know what I am going tot speak, tell it to the others!”,

and he left for home.

Friendship Portals and True Friends

I was bit lazy today....did not write anything to blog here....so just posting something which I wrote for another blog of mine which is part of Friendster, a friendship portal.

******

Recently, one of my friends here posted a message saying something like this : ‘it is very difficult to find a true friend here, in Friendster so be careful’ etc etc

For a moment I thought about it. Did I get a true friend from here? I asked myself….not once but many times….all the time, I got answers like ‘ may be’ , ‘ I don’t know’ etc……but the result of my mind-brain co-ordination hesitated to give the output ‘Yes’, with confidence…..

But does it mean that I agree with that friend of mine? Nope. Because I have studied this place. People join this portal to fulfill different requirements. Though it has a global color, its sort of a Pinoy portal, at least as on today.

Most of them are here to have a ‘virtual get together’. They are looking for their old classmates or old buddies. For such people, this portal is not a disappointing one, that too if one is a Filipina.

Some are here looking for friends (just friends, true friends, time pass ones etc etc).

Those who are here for time pass, they get thousands of friends, that too if you are a good looking female. For many, one or two account itself is not enough. They keep on adding and some of them even keep them in ‘show case’…

If anybody is after just friends, they might also get many friends here, not that difficult.

But if somebody here is looking for a true friend, well, they might get, I am not sure, but it takes time. And it all depends on one’s perception about what a ‘true friend’ is. A good friend of yours can turn into your life partner, but basically, that is not what friendship is all about.

In a real friendship world, it is easy to make out who is close to whom, among our friends circle. But here it is not possible. One can easily get disappointed, after sometime, when one realizes certain ‘realities’.

Those who are here for flirting, they too might get their targets, am not sure, since there are better places for such people.

There are some others who are looking for a ‘relationship’. They better be careful to avoid frustration.

World over, people ends many relationships even after ‘knowing each other’ for many years, personally. Boy friend after boy friend, girl friend after girl friend, divorces after divorce - even after finding their ‘soul mate’…So, if such is the case with the real world, even after knowing people in person for many years, hanging around with them for many years, getting enough chance to understand how the other one reacts or behaves to many situations and ending up in break ups after years, how safe or real is this virtual world? It is a limitation which can be addressed with common sense (there is a saying that common sense is a sense which is absent in common man!!).

In this virtual friendship world, for many of them, it is just a head-hand coordination work, without involving heart. They type many things without any emotional content. And there are also people who play with other people’s emotions. Here the person who is at the receiving end gets hurt (usually the weak minded ones/soft types).

So, take a moment, and come out of it and look at it…..isn’t a funny place? A big family of millions of people from (almost) all over the world, smiling, crying, praying, hurting (getting hurt), cheating (getting cheated), helping (getting helped), advising (getting advised), using scripts for doing good things (and using it to damage), being a culprit (being a victim)…………… remember that it is a cross section of the world and society and hence you meet all kinds of people here, not just goody goody ones.

If you are emotionally depending somebody here, well, its all up to you and your mental strength…

But anyway I am happy to be part of this BIG family and looking forward to meet many wonderful people here.

Intelligence

When I was standing in a queue to pay my telephone bill, a guy said this ‘ how can he be called brilliant? Did he clear his matriculation exam?’ he was talking to another guy, holding a newspaper, and the guy in question is a famous international cricket player from India.

When I looked at him, he smiled at me with a look of ‘ am I right or not’. So I too smiled. (Look at his guts looking at me and smile! This hardly happens, though I am not a monster). I did not converse with him, but avoided. And thought a little more about what he just said.

I think he might be referring to the intelligence of that player. I don’t know whether he passed his matriculation or not, but he is one of the richest Indian and sports person. He has got world reputation and is not a silly thing. I am not a fan of him, but I disagree with that person who thinks this sports person is ‘something else’.

Being intelligent is not being a book worm. It neither is being very studious. Many people think chess players are all ‘intelligent’. If you are not good at chess, they might say, ‘chess needs brains’… I don’t play chess and am not much interested in it. But I know a couple of people who are very good at chess but are were bad at studies. And I know a college topper (engineer)who is bad at 'chess'

So, what is intelligence and who exactly is an intelligent person?

There are tons of definitions by psychiatrists, psychologists etc…but the interesting one I ever heard is this : ‘Intelligence is what you use when you don’t know what to do’ . Is this the most scientific definition? I don’t know but I liked it.

Who is an intelligent person? It depends because intelligence is not a single faculty of the mind. There exists many flavors of it. When we talk about multiple intelligence, we obviously think about Professor Howard Gardner and his theories. Again, there are different opinions. Some say he only identifies seven types and some say he talks about nine. Unfortunately I could not attend any of his class at Harward…

But the seven types are as follows:

1. Musical : why need more explanation? All the music celebrities have this. Not only them, but the sensitive listeners also.- Eg, composers, Singers…

2. Logical and Mathematical : Those who like playing with numbers, strategy, quantify, patterns etc etc. – Scientists, Detectives…

3. Interpersonal : The ability to understand and interact with others. This is not just verbal communication but also includes the non verbal acting skills. – Politicians, social workers…

4. Intra-personal : The capacity to understand oneself, one’s thoughts, feelings, human condition etc and use that knowledge. – Spiritual Leaders, philosophers, psychologists….

5. Kinesthetic/Physical/Bodily : The use of physical ability and strength. These people has better ‘timing’ ability, mind-body co-ordination. – Athletes, dancers and yes, surgeons…

6. Linguistic : Ability to think in words and to use language to express and appreciate complex meaning. These people like telling stories, doing crossword puzzles etc – Novelists, journalists, public speakers…

7. Spatial: Thinking in three dimension….Imaginative, good at image manipulation, graphic and artistic skills….- Painters, architects, sailors, sculptors…

From the above it is clear that the sports person in question is intelligent, without any question. Usually, we all are a mixture of all these and in some people, one or more skills dominates.

Life is a Candle

Your mind is a flame. You are a flame, this body is a wick, and the karma is the wax. As long as the karma is there and the wick is here, then your mind, the glow, sticks onto it. Your soul sticks onto it. - Guruji

God's Work!

Following is taken from one of my mails I wrote 2-3 years ago.

"

....
....

Understand one thing, God’s work is not just working in/only in any ashrams or being with holy people. And with the same logic, we can say just coz you are in the ashram, whatever you do can not be called as God’s work. God is love and he doesn’t want us to suffer. Jesus suffered a lot of pain; you can guess how it feels when nails passing through your flesh….may be he got fainted coz of the sheer pain. But he didn’t want us to suffer like that; instead he said he suffered it for the entire humanity. (But still why we suffer is a different issue.) And in India, some fools even believes in torturing their own bodies to please God. I agree that India is rich in spirituality, but don’t ever think that every Indian you meet is spiritual. When I read about your back pain while you were in the ashram, two things came into my mind.

I always believed in good and bad and want to stand with the good. I was known as a good person (don’t think that I became bad now). But what I received from others or from the nature (as fate) wasn’t good (may be my Guru is staring at me at this point….lol). Whenever this sort of thing- bad things- happens, I used to ask “ why me? I was always good to others” . Then one day my Guru’s answer came, “ see, there is no point in just being a goodie goodie in this world, you need skills to survive in this planet….you have to be good but intelligent too”.

A year ago or so, I was in the ashram doing a course. Seva was part of the course. Every person should do some seva (some pple wont listen even if it is from Guru’s mouth, they do it as a work, if at all they do it). One day I decided to help the kitchen people with cleaning. It was hard physical work. They cooked for thousands. I kept on doing it. Almost every one had food, but not me. (I have this acidity and migraine problems. If I don’t eat in time, I might develop stomach probs and head ache) I was still cleaning. Finally when it became past 3, I took some food and started eating. Then came the kitchen-in-charge. He scolded me. Can you guess why?

He said “I know you are doing seva here, as part of your course, but it doesn’t mean that you should not have your food in time….all the time, I thought you had food….” (removed name), don’t expect people like him even in ashrams, these days. They are rare species.

"

Note: Seva means Volunteer work or selfless service or work offered to God etc

Its A Dog's Life !

Ever thought about why dogs are so loving?

I never got any particular answer for it, though I thought about it. I thought may be its in their nature to love humans. I did not try to get an answer looking deep into any of our scriptures. Since we have tons of scriptures and it touches every aspect of life, there must be some solid things available. But its like searching in the ocean.

There are lots of mentions about dogs and their love, in most of the religions or religious books and scriptures. For a layman Hindu, if at all he/she remembers, most probably, the dog related memory that connects to religion might be the dog that followed the Yudhistira, the eldest of Pandavas (Mahabharata).



Mahabharatha, the great epic of India almost ends with this dog story. Yudhishtira, his four other brothers and wife decides to renounce kingdom and even life. They started for the Himalayas. A dog followed them. All the five died on their way who followed Yudhishtira but the dog. At the entrance of the heaven, Lord of the Heaven asked him to ditch the dog and then Yudhishtira refuses to enter and he says

“ I can not leave this holy creature who has accompanied me through all my trials and tribulations. Either you admit both, or else I will not enter Heaven”

Most of the Muslims I know don’t have dog as their pet and one of them told me they are not supposed to keep it. They consider dog as a ‘dog’. But I refuse to believe in it coz there is a story like this, connected to Mohammed the Prophet.

One day, a panting dog feebly approached one of his followers, who took notice of the poor animal. Seeing a puddle of muddy water, he tore a scrap off the hem of his shirt, soaked it in the water and taking the dog in his lap, he moistened its mouth.

Another person, witnessing this, went and told the Prophet that a member of the group had handled a filthy animal, "and therefore he should not be allowed back here again." Mohammed asked, "What was he doing to the dog ?" "I don't know, but I saw him moistening its mouth with a torn piece of cloth dipped in muddy water." "Then," replied the Prophet, "He is a better Muslim than you, because he is kind to animals."

In the Bible, there is no direct mentioning of any connection between Jesus and dogs. But the other day I read something strange. Somebody saying that Jesus was followed by a puppy (I wish to add : a cute lil puppy). As we know, Jesus was love and he was promoting love. A dog also shows love and spreads the message of love. Jesus tried to ease the suffering of the mankind and so do a dog. Look at this:

(What I have with me is the New King James Version of The Holy Bible)

“ There was a certain rich man who was clothed in purple and fine linen and fared sumptuously everyday.

But there was a certain begger named Lazarus, full of sores, who was laid at his gate.

Desiring to be fed with the crumbs which fell from the rich man’s table. Moreover, the dogs came and licked his sores.

So, it was that the beggar died and was carried by the angles to Abraham’s bosom. The rich man also died and was buried”

- LUKE 16:19,20,21,22

But it looks like it is the Greek who really availed the dog’s doc service, apart from their guard and guide roles. From 500 BC till 300 A.D, in Asklepian Temples (Asklepius is the son of Apollo), dogs served as healers. These dogs were called cynotherapists. They used to smell the ill pple and then lick. But most of those temples got destructed and I don’t know what happened to those dogs. It is said that they got killed or thrown into the streets. One thing I am sure, if Jesus were there, he wouldn’t have allowed them to do so.

When St.Roch was just Roch, he had a wonderful dog. He was involved in healing plague, in the Europe, and he himself contracted the disease. When he was in the dying bed (?? He was lying under a tree), this dog used to steal a loaf of bread everyday for him and even licked his master's sores.

Florence Nightingale also promoted pets in therapies. Now it is proved that a dog’s saliva has got antibiotic capabilities (I think our saliva also should have similar qualities).



MOTI the dog who came with me (us) during Himalayan Hiking (over 13000 ft above sea level, he came all the way)

So, what are dogs, if they are not living example for love and care?

Lucid Moment!!

How many blogs I read on a regular basis? None.

I am not particularly regular with anybody else’s blogs these days. I got pulled to blogs by one of my friends, I was very keen reading her blogs when she was writing about her visit to India. I commented on most of her posts. Thus my first blog related writing was putting comments on somebody else’s blog.

But I used to read some blogs randomly. Many people around us are very talented and gifted. These blogs are a nice place for them to grow and express their thoughts and views. This year I read some nice poems, some nice thoughts on technology, money making using blogs (which ended up in a tragedy in my case), some bad stuffs (psssssst) etc etc.

So which is the title or ‘something’ that attracted me more, as far as the blogs I already read are concerned?

One guy says, “there are three ways to write, the right way, the wrong way and my way” I don’t remember in which blog it is. But I liked it…..nicely put….

Anybody already wrote something which I wished to write? Sometimes I think so.

Though they used different words and style, many of them said what I wanted to express. I don’t have any issues in that.

But there are some ‘titles ‘that I really wished to use but already used by others. Two of such which I always remember are:

In my Lucid State

Surreal Moment

I am happy that at least these were used by one of my buddies.

(Man, am not prejudiced, it’s a truth)

Gimme a Date!

It looks like the season of Relationships is over. One of them who came to me earlier now keeps mum, as if she doesn’t want to talk to me. May be things are fine at her end. But last week, one of my friends talked to me about her failed date.

They met each other on the net. Had some chats. Exchanged some pics. Made some fone calls. Everything went just great……Then this date. Then this disappointment!

According to her, his physical appearance wasn’t as she thought. Then this and that…. Her version was that he wasn’t truthful. I don’t know what he has to say.

My role was listener. So, I just listened. But I was surprised too because she was an educated girl. As with present generation of girls, they are well versed with internet. So, I thought a little about a Date.

I personally don’t have a date experience. (Once I had a coffee with a friend in a restaurant. She was just a friend, a close friend. Then I had picked up a friend of mine from her hostel directly to my home. She spent half the day with me and my mother. We talked a lot and had lunch and tea together (hey, I am talking about you, buddy, who was doing a research paper for your PhD on Thomas Hardy. I then gave you my copy of The Woodlanders to you, remember?). In both cases, we never had any idea to build up any sort of relationship other than friendship).

I am not talking about how to date a woman. It looks like, most of the time, if a date fails, men usually stands at the safer side. He don’t have anything to lose, apart from some money. But I feel girls should be more careful and cautious.

Most common mistakes made by girls during a date:

1. Leaving an impression that you are badly in need of a date. The Needy and Insecure aspect.

How does a man read this aspect? If you ever use any swear word to talk about your old boyfriend. A man with reasonable brains will note it. If a girl thought this will impress her new man, she is wrong.

2. Too much physical contact.

A man will definitely note this, enjoy this but will never mention what he thinks about this girl.

3. Giving too much priority over his sex aspect than his emotional aspect.

If a girl thinks the sex she offers/obliges will get translated into a solid relationship, she is wrong. Men are not just fools to not to observer this. They will enjoy the sex part but they also are capable of sorting out the emotional attachment and sexual attachment.

In a relationship, men are (if he is serious) not after just sex. He expects his other half to understand him emotionally.

4. Too much attraction

The problem with trying to attract too much or getting attracted to (out of proportion) will definitely create a strange problem. When we see somebody too much attractive, that force of attraction overrides our basic logics and instincts. This is a problem that will develop in the long run. We are not going to lead a long lasting relationship based on a particular body part or faculty (like ability to sing). It is beyond that.

And what about net based dates? Since there are lots of dating sites coming up, one should be a lil careful with them. There are some basic precautions a girl should take.

The following advice looks convincing:

1. Know your date. Don't go out with someone unless you have exchanged emails a few times and talked on the phone. Make sure you have a good feeling about the person. Trust your inner voice. If the other person is for real, he should understand and be able to wait a bit longer.

2. Meet in a public place for the first few times. Have coffee at a restaurant or go to a movie. Most likely nothing will happen but it is better to be safe than sorry.

3. For a first date, maybe invite the person to a party you are going too where you will have some friends and they will be able to bring some their friends. If it doesn't work out at least you can still have some fun.

4. Always tell someone where you are going and who you are going with, and tell them you will call when you get home. Make sure to bring your cell phone and some extra money, just in case you find out you are not a match and you need to get home.

5. Make sure you have a time limit on your first date. It will allow for an out if you need it. A good example for this is going to lunch.

6. Get a few photo's of the person, especially some with his friends or family. It will give you some hints on what type of person he is plus you will know who to look for when you go to meet him.

7. Don't let the person pick you up at home, meet the person at the location you are going to. You shouldn't give out your address until you have met the person a few times. Always be aware of the personal information you're revealing to a date. Most likely nothing will happen but it is better to be safe than sorry.

8. Never do anything you feel unsure about. As an example if he suggests to sitting at the back of the theater and you don't want to, then don't. If they continue to try, walk out. If the person has already raised a few red flags on the first date, it probably is not going to work out.

9. Refrain from drinking excessively, as it could impair your ability to make good and wise decisions.

10. If you are serious and want to do a criminal background check for your date, many people offer it. This too is not a bad idea.

What kind of a person you should consider if you are looking for a life partner? Your other half should compliment you, at least in some basic personality aspects. Two egoistic people, two very proud people, two very sensitive people, two very insensitive people, two short tempered people, two very emotional people, two very arrogant people etc etc has got less chance to go on and on and on.

Me, Now-Friends and IMs

So far, I have used MSN, Yahoo!, Google Talk, and ICQ (once or twice, long ago). MSN was my first IM. And my most of the contacts had MSN…

When I was with MSN, I was part of a chat room. A room to discuss about almost anything decent. The moderator was from the U.S (how do I know? For skilled users, there were ways to find this out). I forgot his name. Then he made me a moderator. We never allowed racist people there. I had some good time with that chat room. I met lots of good and nice people there. Everyday, new new people, new new things to discuss. Since the other moderator was in the U.S., we met each other only during a cusp period. When he sleeps, I used to be there (not always) and when I sleep, he used to be there…

I was regular with some other chat rooms also, like medical, psychology, spiritual, religion etc. Another one was a room where depressed people used to come. I wasn’t depressed, though I was stressed ….I was there to study people and help…. I tried to help many people there. One thing I remember is, most of the time, at least a couple of visitors were interested in talking about cats….once I got kicked off from that room for cracking some jokes!! And they banned me for 24 hours!!!

That time, I got a couple of friends from those rooms. But alas!, I lost all of them, except Two (may be three, cant say since one guy is still there in my MSN, though we don’t chat).

One was a lady from the U.S. She was very kind and informative. She gave me lots of information about her place. She underwent a surgery and after that I had only a couple of chats with her. She wasn’t rich and she wasn’t able to take enough post-operative care. She told me, if she won’t report she will lose her job. Yes, she was an American born Italian. (Hope she is still alive.). Thus only one left. I thought I lost this person but came back after a long break. Thanks buddy.

(There is one exception. I got one person after a looong search just to ask a doubt about Trekking/hiking shoe and became a buddy, though we don’t chat these days)

Because of these chat rooms, I was/am lucky to have chat with people from Australia, the U.S, Philippines, Russia, Laos, Turkey, China, Korea, Pakistan, Thailand (this I suspect now, after my Thailand visit….English is not that popular there) and Estonia…. This is what I remember now.

When Microsoft stopped free MSN Chat Rooms for India, I shifted to Yahoo!. But I did not spent much time with Yahoo!. I liked MSN rooms compared to Yahoo. I never was regular with any of the Yahoo chat rooms. Same with my IM, there weren’t many contacts in my Yahoo IM. So, I hardly used it.

I don’t remember any ICQ related friends or event, as far as my ICQ IM is concerned. With ICQ, I had a more web based chats, in rooms. I never had any ICQ friend. May be it will come soooooooon, after I install ICQ (hehehe)

Then came the Google Talk. I have only one exclusive Google Talk friend who doesn’t have any other IM.

This year, I became part of a friendship portal and then Yahoo came back again.

So, which is the IM of my choice? MSN, Yahoo! ICQ or Google Talk?

Since most of my present buddies are in Yahoo I habitually use Yahoo these days.

If you are looking for stability, go with GoogleTalk. And it is brilliantly linked to Gmail. It works most of the time. Then comes MSN. But MSN has got some connectivity issues. And at the last position comes Yahoo! (I don’t know much about ICQ, as on this date)

But Yahoo has got so many other things in its basket.

The most beautiful thing about Yahoo! is its emoticons (about 88 of them) and audibles. If you have not tried those, you are missing something . Yahoo! has got such cute emoticons. And now, audibles in many different languages. Let us have a closer look at the Yahoo! IM ….No, I am not paid for writing about Yahoo!.

• Photo Sharing
• Radio
• Games
• IMvironments – theme based background
• You can add your MSN buddies here
• Search
• Calendar
• File transfer
• Stealth mode
• Allows to add plug-ins
• Avatars
• Skins
• Free Chat Rooms
• Sound Effects during PC calls
• Yahoo Mobile
• PC to PC calls
• Phone to PC calls (not free)
• PC to Phone calls (not free)
• Blogs
• Conference
• Webcam

May be many more…….but it is horrible as far as providing a stable and continuous connection. You will get disconnected very frequently (with default settings)

Is that the only thing bad with Yahoo!? Nope

There is a big bug with the Photo Sharing, which can lead to misunderstanding (I have personal experience). The photo sharing allows the other person to save the pic in the window. What if the person who is placing the picture is trying to remove the pic while the other person is trying to save?

It gives a message to the person who has kept the pic, saying that the other person is saving the image…..True.

What if the picture is still in the process of streaming (that is one person has kept a pic in the folder/window and the other person is not able to see it properly as the bits are still in transfer) and the person who kept it on the folder tries to remove it?

It will again give the very same message saying that the other person is saving a bigger version of the image, which is ridiculous.

What about the stealth mode? Is it possible to find a person who is online but in invisible mode? The answer is ‘Yes’ , if one is ready to compromise one’s own security, it is possible…Now the security is so pathetic in this aspect that anybody in this world can find out anybody else’s yahoo online status……

How safe is the cam? Can we see somebody’s cam without their permission? I started thinking in this direction when I noticed somebody trying to connect to my cam......my present knowledge in this regard is not enough to give an explanation to this….

Can we use multiple ids at the same time in the same PC? It is possible

Can we fake the cam? Yes, you can

These crooked things are not provided by Yahoo! But it is high time Yahoo! look into these matters and fix the bugs for once and all. I have sent out a mail to them but did not get any reply so far.

Friendship Day!

Yesterday was ‘Friendship Day”……

Who are friends? If you checkout the friendship related cards, you get a lot of definitions. Friends are like this… friends are like that……Many are fancy ones and many are funny ones. Many makes us think, many makes us laugh…

The very latest one which I remember is one by one of my friends:

“Friends are like piss on your pants. Everyone can see it but only you can feel the warmth of it. Thank you for being the piss on my pants!”

Yesterday I spent some time to go back to my memories related to my friends….there came some smile…there came some pain too…

I never thought some of those moments would remain as ‘most memorable’ moments in my life, even after 10-15-20 years…..

The major difference between the ‘then friends’ and ‘now friends’ in my life is, my then friends were for real, who were physically present with me…..time changed …and my now friends are mostly friends who really exists somewhere but may not exist as what they claim what they are……

Its my personal experience. My type are rare type. Even in the cyber world, most of the people around me are having my then friends and not my now friends, though its now. I don’t know whether they are aware how lucky they are……

On this special occasion , I would like to thank all my then friends and now friends…..for making me feel light, making me cry, making me laugh, making me think, making me crazy, making me feel that I am part of this world, for making me understand how beautiful friendships are……

I am not here to announce ‘my friend of the year’ …… but I dedicate this day to a friend who made me soooo sad and soooo happy………

HAPPY FRIENDSHIP DAY!!!