Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Life in the US - Part 1

It’s my first ‘living anniversary’ here in US. Time just flew. How was my life here, so far? It’s good, of course. No complaints. I said no complaints coz what I am going to write are not complaints but some of my observations.

This is my first firsthand experience living in a capitalist country. I had read a lot about US before, including some travelogues. But travelogues have a different approach. How similar it is the life here compared to a country like India?

Quarter dollar is an important aspect of those who live here. We need them for using public phones, coin operated laundries, parking lots etc. And hence we can ‘buy’ quarter dollar from most of the grocery stores. It comes rolled and a roll will contain 40 coins. So, if any increment comes in coin operated services, we need to pay at least a quarter dollar extra, not 5 or 10 cents.

The public school system here is very good as far as the easiness of admission and interaction with teachers etc are concerned. Every child here has got a seat in the school for sure and there is no choice but to attend a particular school (not talking about private schools). Unlike India, a job in a public school is not a permanent job. One can get fired. Here the teachers are there to teach and not to play politics. Most of the teachers like teaching and they are not there just to make a living. Every school keeps its own fund and every school district has its own fund. If a school district has to cut funds, it even cut teaching jobs. Dental hygiene is important here. And there are no kids with disarranged teeth (like the one I have). They all align it (this has become a common trend, which is good, around the world, these days) when they are teens and it’s a big business too.   Head lice is also considered as a serious issue here. Kids can even stay home during the lice treatment period (they have to make some arrangements to pick up homework and assignments). 

One aspect I did not understand is the ‘Drugs’ and ‘Drinks’ aspect. One day, when my son told me how to drink wine without getting drunk, I was surprised and I asked who told him that and he said his Physical Education teacher and its part of his job! Drugs are the funniest part. From elementary school they will start issuing the ‘anti-drug’ awareness pamphlets and newsletters. Drugs are a common problem in high schools and some schools are particularly known for drugs. Now, the ‘what I do not understand’ part. It is not a big deal to find out where it comes from, if the police and school authorities work together and use some technology. But why it’s not happening? From where all those drugs are flowing into schools and what is the police doing? Instead of issuing newsletters, why can’t they burst the network? Another ‘I do not understand’ thing is the school bullies. Every year, lots of kids commit suicide here in US coz of bullying. (In India, there is this ‘samam, vedam, krodam and dandam’ principle to up bring kids. Means, first you tell in a way the kid can understand; if that fails, then give advice; if not solved, show anger.. if that too fails, give physical punishment) 

There are no small here in US, in general. Almost all retail shops are chains. Target, Home Depot, Trader Joe’s, H&M, OfficeMax, Best Buy, Macy’s, Starbucks, Costco, Safeway, FoodMaxx, JC Penny, Toys R Us,  Wal-Mart, K-Mart, Denny’s, Wendy’s, Walgreens, CVS….its a long list. Most of these chains have got their in-house brand and they even sell generic drugs in their label, apart from the pharmacy stores like Walgreens and CVS. Pharmacy stores are not just pharmacy stores. They sell all the medicine plus they stock almost everything else including toys, greeting cards and even alcoholic beverages.

Medicine is divided into prescription drugs and over the counter (OTC) drugs. But there is no need to worry if one wants to do self-medication. Almost all the essential drugs are sold OTC, including some ‘sleep aide’ ones. These sleep aides are kind of cheating. They are all mostly antihistamines (anti-allergy drugs) which has the side effect drowsiness. Apart from this, hormones like melatonin, which has a lot to do with sleep, is also sold OTC. Cold medicines come in two versions – day and night. Night one contains something (usually antihistamine or some decongestant) that makes you sleep/drowsy. Anti-biotic comes under prescription drugs and usually the doc sends the prescription directly to the pharmacy (any pharmacy of our choice) and we can pick up the medicine from the pharmacy store; we cannot choose the brand. Knowingly or unknowingly, most of those who live here take vitamins in excess. This is because most of the bread, milk, cereals etc comes with added vitamins, many a times the same vitamins. Plus many of them take vitamin supplements for no reason at all. Again, B group of vitamins along with some minerals are sold as vitamins for nail, hair, skin etc. 

 Speaking about the pharmacy, this country is ‘ruled’ by Pharma and Insurance giants. Every year most people take ‘flu shots’ during winter. Do we really need it? How do the scientists know which virus is going to hit this year? What if we catch a cold/flu even after getting vaccinated? Well, don’t ask such ‘stupid’ questions. If you want, get the vaccine or keep quite…Medicines are ridiculously priced. A small tube of antibacterial cream which can be sold for less than 5 dollars costs more than 10 dollars. We can hardly find anything for less than 5 dollar in medicine category. My son had to do a physical exam, a vaccine and a tester drug before his school admission and the bill was over 500 dollars. They make 10 tablets for less than a dollar (by outsourcing) and sell each for nearly 10 dollars. A TT injection for my son was 110 dollars. How can somebody afford it? Angels comes in the form if Health Insurance.

This ridiculous rate makes insurance a must. Will that policy cover our teeth? Eyes? No, we need to get dental insurance and eye care separately. Almost all the primary care docs have got only the basic medical education (in India, if one has only a bachelor degree in medicine, he/she will face a tough time to get patients). Most of the dental ‘work’ can be paid in EMIs. That tells how expensive it is. If one has to do a consultation, a cleaning and couple of root canal treatment with crown, it is cheaper to go to some other country like India and get it done. Same with many surgeries. This was the reason why medical tourism was picking up in India and then all of a sudden a ‘bug’ originated from India which seriously damaged the medical tourism. From where did that bug come from? Who created that? Shhhhh…

Vehicle insurance is another trick. Here the insurance is not for the vehicle. Vehicle insurance is tagged to a vehicle and a person together. In India, insurance is for the vehicle. Anybody who has a valid driver license can drive a vehicle which is insured. So, if there are 5 members (with valid driver license) in a family, all of them can drive/share the same car without paying any additional amount for insurance. Here the insurance goes up when more people are added up. And different insurance agency will give different rate. If we just take a policy we might end up paying more for no reason at all. Some credit card comes with some basic insurance too. But most people, including me do not know the exact terms and conditions for such coverage. Usually car insurance will cost a few thousand dollars per year; it depends on the make of the car, where we drive, the driver’s driving history, age etc

Among the chain stores one is interesting. Costco. This is a wholesale store but for individuals…weird? We need a membership ($50 per year for the basic membership and $100 for the executive). Things are supposed to be less priced here. To what extend it is less? I asked couple of people, including myself and nobody has got a clear answer. The trick is every item we buy from Costco is specially packed for them, in large quantities. If we want a tooth paste, we need to buy a minimum of 5. If we want to buy milk, we need to buy 2 gallon minimum. If something is comes in 100 grams at a normal store, here it comes at 325 or 475 grams. Who is going to compare gram to gram? I admit that I have not done that kind of a calculation so far and as of now, I do not know any CPA here (they might have tried this for sure). Everybody who go there end up spending at least 100 bucks at a time. What if we don’t go? We get this feeling ‘hey I paid 50 bucks for membership. I need to make use of it’. Some of the branded cloths are specially made for Costco and there is quality difference. I am not saying that there is no saving at all, of course there is this cash back. But there are some under currents. The more we spend on in-house brand (Kirkland) the more we ‘save’, possibly. In US, the maximum retail price is not printed on the products in human readable form but only in barcode. This allows retailers sell things at a price of their choice. For a pack of lay’s chips, we have to pay a lot more if we buy from a gas station (there almost everything cost more). And every gas stations sell same gas at different price. If we live in a posh area, they charge more. The first gas station after we exit from a freeway will charge more. We need to pay more on weekends too.

Mobile phone or wireless phone as we say here is another ‘experience’. We need to pay for everything, including incoming calls and texts (Back in India, all incoming calls and texts are free, for all telephone service). If we want an iphone, we do not have any choice but to get service from AT&T (as of now). Each carrier has their models. We cannot simply buy this or that phone unless we are ready to change service provider too. Basic service is only for basic phones and smart phones comes with mandatory data package (In India, we can buy any handset we want and use with our current service provider. No particular service is compulsory. We can buy a HTC android and still stick to basic service if we want). 

Here, auto mechanics (and lawyers) are known for charging very high fee. Back in India there was something called ‘servicing’ the car. Means, we can give the car to a workshop for ‘service’. They will do complete checkup (bumper to bumper) go for a trial run and fix problems if any. There are pickup and drop service too. Here they cannot pick up or drop coz they do not have insurance for that vehicle and hence cannot go for a trial run on the road too. Here service is part by part, generally. Most of the workshops have this ‘break package’ ‘oil change package’, ‘timing belt package’, 'headlight package' etc. While doing the wheel rotation, they will check the tire pressure of only 4 tires and the spare tire will be spared. Almost all the time, the labor will cost more than the parts. Hence, a lot of people do most of the minor works by themselves, to the extent possible. 

 

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Out of the Box

It was about why Indians don’t say ‘I love you’ very often just like the people in the west. I was told:

“I hate it when people don’t say it”

Why a typical Indian don’t say ‘I love you’ to his spouse or kids or friends just like that? And why somebody from the west should hate that Indian attitude?

 I was thinking about that. My father never told “I love you” to me. Nor did my mother or sister. Never heard that from any of my relatives or Indian friends too….Does that mean that they did not love me? I don’t think so..

Take a generation back. What is the divorce rate among old fashioned Indians who almost never said  ‘I love you’ to their spouse? Almost zero (among my parents’ generation, I don’t know even a single relative or acquaintance of mine who got divorced). What about the same with the west? Not much change from the current rate. What does this mean? At least this does NOT mean that those old fashioned Indian did not love their spouse. Btw, this also does not mean that Indians never express their love and care. How do they express is out of scope of this blog.

(I was thinking about my mother tongue. What is the equivalent for ‘I love you’? The closest is – ‘Njan nine premikkunnu’. For us, it is too dramatic. May be we can use it in love notes or in movies but hard to use in a face to face conversation. Of course we can say that in English. But in that case, how can that be part of Indian culture? India speaks over a hundred languages and every language is totally free from English. Zero influence; in fact, Indian language has influence on many other world languages, including English)

There are certain things in this world we should not ‘why’. It is meaningless. For example, in many countries (including India) there is one hand gesture for expressing ‘super’, ‘great’, ‘fantastic’ ‘excellent’ ‘awesome’ etc by touching the thumb and index finger and keeping the other three fingers straight. But this gesture is something filthy in some other countries. If one Indian goes and ‘why’ somebody from that country will that help? Nope. Most of the Asian countries have got traditional dress for wedding. Why can’t they dress like the west, in a ‘modern’ way?

Is there any point in an Indian pointing finger at west and a westerner pointing finger at India without trying to understand the cultures and undercurrents?

Recently Philippines and Indonesia had floods in some parts of their country. When asked, couple of Indonesians started with

“Alhamdulillah…..” (it means all praise only for Allah) 

and Philippinos did not start with any particular expression. Why? May be because they don’t have an equivalent expression, as per their tradition, I don’t know.

Once somebody told me

“I have all the answers in my scripture, so I don’t have to read any other one”

Here that person meant the scriptures of other religions.  

Some people say:

“My God is the only true God”?

So, all ‘other Gods’ are pirated, right? 

Why is it so?

How did ancient Indian Rishis say there is fire deep inside the Earth without even seeing any volcano in their lives, that too thousands of years ago? How did they say it is Earth which is rotating the sun when even glass was not known to humans? (no glass, no telescope). How did they foresee tissue culture, bore well etc? How could they talk about virgins giving birth (thousands of years before Jesus’s birth). How did that happen?

It is the BOX. We all have a box around our ‘thought factory’ the mind or we sit inside a box, when it comes to many things. That is why it is said that we need to think out of the box, at least sometimes.

Albert Einstein stands out from among the past and present scientists (Looking at the earth, he had wondered how earth stays at a perfect distance from the sun so that earth gets the right amount of heat. He could not come out with any equation. He did not think it as a coincidence nor did he believe in the conventional God). So does Bill Gates and Steve Jobs. They were capable of thinking out of the box. Not just them, those ‘rain makers’, inventors, designers, researchers, scientists and most of the ‘successful’ people. If they had seen only the obvious ones, they would not have been there where they are now. Computer, airplane, mobile phone, missile, satellite, submarine….. all those thousands of items around us are there because somebody thought out of the box. Every one of us may not be able to contribute like them. But every one of us has some area where there is scope for a little bit of out of the box thinking….

 

 

 

Monday, November 08, 2010

Keep Moving..

When I posted the psalm 22, I wasn’t just quoting something from the Bible but it had something to do with something else. Well, God gave me this answer:

‘You are on a journey. In this journey you will see many wonderful things but don’t get caught up by something thinking that it is the most beautiful thing. Keep moving. You might see more wonderful things.…”

Some buts…..

Thank you God for walking with me… Thank you for staying with me, when I stopped….Thank you for pushing me further when I felt tired.

I love you…

 

 

Thursday, November 04, 2010

Why?

My God, my God, why hast thou forsaken me? why art thou so far from helping me, and from the words of my roaring?


O my God, I cry in the day time, but thou hearest not; and in the night season, and am not silent.

Psalm 22: 1-2

Read This too:

http://theworldofjayaram.blogspot.com/2010/11/keep-moving.html


Wednesday, October 27, 2010

Is This World Real?


Some 4-5 years ago, I was reading the Indian scripture Yoga Vasishta . It wasn’t easy to understand. Just like any other scripture, we need a teacher. Rishi Vasistha tells this to prince Ram (Lord Ram’s era was 7600 BC) –   

‘..this world you see is not real’

(not verbatim or translation).

I did not really think much about it when I read that, coz the concept of maya (illusion) wasn’t anything new to me. So, I thought it in that direction, though I knew that Yoga Vasishta is very hard to digest and it has great depths.

Today, I was checking my son’s school bag and there comes a worksheet about Electromagnetic spectrum. I had studied this and still remember some basic things about it. But I happened to stare at the diagram and then it was a real surprise for me.

Look at the range starting from Extremely low frequency. It goes to super low, voice frequency, very low, low, medium, high, very high, super high, extremely high, radio waves, far infrared, mid infrared, near infrared, VISIBLE LIGHT, near ultraviolet, extremely ultraviolet, soft X-rays, hard X-rays and gamma rays. From the range of 1 meter to less than 1 Nano meter, what we humans can see is ONLY 700 to 400 nm. Not even 10 percent of the whole range.


How does a snake see us? Its vision is infrared vision. They see the world in a totally different way than we humans do. We do not know how every species of living things exactly see this world (scientists say bulls are color blind but I have personally been attacked by a cow when I was wearing a red Tshirt. Same thing happened with my wife on another occasion by another street cow. I still do not understand this)

So, what we see with our naked eye is the only reality?

 

 

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

You and What Army?

Almost every country in this world has got their own defense department with 3 major divisions to take care of their Land, Air and Water borders – Army, Air Force and Navy. Generally speaking, the duty of these soldiers is to protect their nation or fight for their nation.

What about God’s Army? It’s funny that there exist human armies for God.  They are ready to fight for their God (But some do only aggressive marketing of their God). Many of the killings and attacks which have some religious interest were operated by such army men.

May be they never heard of Earthquake/landslide (The Army), Hurricane (The Air Force) and Tsunami/Flood (The Navy)… God speaks through nature and He has his means to handle His things.

You and what army?

 

 

Monday, October 18, 2010

A pain for two...

What could be two possible worst and painful situations in our life? 

A believer in God could not pray

An overnight vanishing act by a close friend, when friendship is at its best and the other person sitting a thousand miles away thinking what is happening at the other end …

Friday, September 24, 2010

Math and Sleep

Some days back, I had to answer a simple mental math question. But it wasn’t easy for me, though I knew how to solve it. It took more than the standard time required. I became sad about it and thought – what is wrong with me? Why is my brain dull today?   

After analyzing how my days were in the past couple of days, I zeroed in to one thing – lack of sleep. I observed how well I am with math whenever I had sleepless nights.  I found out that many a times it even takes more time to understand a question, hard to recollect the formulas and methods...

Then I decided to write down the names of all the people I know who are good at math and check how well they sleep daily. I had to wait for couple of days to get replies form some people.  I knew 15 people who are really good at math and surprisingly, ALL of them sleep very well.  Among those 15, there is one particular guy who is kind of math lover. He still keeps his math text books with him and solves problems when he is bored or after a ‘fight’ with his wife. When I asked his wife how her husband sleeps, her answer was:

“He sleeps like a baby”

Should I tell more?

Thursday, September 16, 2010

God and Ocean

The other day I asked one of my contacts how things are at their end. That person knows that we both do not belong to the same religion and responded starting with “my God's blessings…” . That (business) person was very happy because it was festival time and the business was doing well. But again, the festival belonged to people who believed in a different faith than this person. So, most of the money this person received was from people who believed in some other God. And there was no problem in accepting that money. (But I know one lady who asked her son to tear a currency note he received for playing guitar on an occasion held by a different faith group - super faith !!) Isn't it interesting? May be those two Gods made a deal to help their followers, a mutual understanding?

The ‘my God’ in the expression ‘Oh My God’ is different from the ‘my God is taking care of me’ expressed by somebody to a person who believes in another faith.

When the burn a scripture thing was going on, I read a ‘my God can't stand your god anymore' kind of statement. This is sheer ignorance. How stupid it is to believe that God created everything and at the same time He created a set of believers and non-believers and then asked the believers to kill the non-believers to reserve a seat in heaven? But still people believe in that theory in this modern world. And we see the results.

Scriptures are the result of observation of nature and not the other way around (I am talking about the concept and not interpretations). That is, nature is not the result of any scripture but it is THE scripture by itself.

God is like the ocean. It is one water body. It has different names in different geographical locations for a better understanding – The Indian Ocean, the Pacific Ocean, the Atlantic Ocean…they are all one and the same.

 

Thursday, September 09, 2010

Burn A Koran for Instant Popularity ?

 Pastor Terry Jones


The day is nearing , September the 11 and his popularity got shot up. Pastor Terry Jones fond an easy way to super popularity by declaring an international day for burning Koran – 9/11

Look at the people who commented against this – The Vatican, Hillary Clinton, Angelina Jolie…..unfortunately the list includes the church founded by him in Germany too. 

He wanted to organize this as a major event and hence even applied for a permit with the Florida fire department (but got denied). But he says he will go ahead with his plan. If this event becomes a success, it will result in political issues between US and some Islamic countries. 

This is another example of religion falling in the hands of wrong people. When it happens, a minority or even a single person can cause damage to the majority who might have a different perception.

Isn’t it just a cheap way to instant popularity?

 

Wednesday, September 08, 2010

Ladder

She asked him to

Hold the ladder

So she will not fall.

He held the ladder

Coz he heard her say

She climbed, up

Up, up and away.

Away she went

Alas! She went.

Still he holds the ladder

Coz he can’t hear her say

 

Saturday, September 04, 2010

Science, God and Creation

The other day a book written by a famous theoretical physicist/scientist came in news. Mainly because of his views on God and creation.  He says, the universe is capable of creating itself without God because of the laws of the nature. I am not being sarcastic but it was amusing for me. I don’t have a PhD, I did not win a Nobel either. But I wonder from where did these laws of nature come from? 

Dear scientist, its your ignorance about other cultures and their scriptures that lead you to anti God theory. What you are thinking now was already been thought by some wise men, that too 7000-10000 years back.

Science and religions should go hand in hand and not the other way. If somebody want to keep science and religion separate, all the religions in this world goes to one place labeled as ‘Religion’.  Isn’t it so? If that is the case, understand that, when we consider the essence of all religions together, it do not think that God is an old man sitting up in the sky with stick to punish us for our sins. The forms of God and different ways of worship came in to existence with some reasons. 

My dear scientist, I am not disagreeing with you, but I agree. Your theory about this creation is right. The creator is ‘swyambhu’ which means the one who created himself.  This is not any invention but known to some part of the world, thousands of years ago. 

Thanks for the book, it looks like things are going in the right direction.

May be one day another scientist would say the cause of creation became the creation itself...

 

Thursday, August 26, 2010

Ramadan Thought for Whomsoever,,,

This is kind of a long due blog considering my precious response ‘records’. I had a question from one of my acquaintances asking me (mainly) why I didn’t write anything good about her religion (Islam). Plus why I have a pro-Jesus attitude….I am not sure whether that person would come again and check my blogs or not. Still..

I thought about this many times and I don’t know how to express my thoughts in this connection coz this cannot be answered with an one-liner and a lengthy one is not worth the time I need to spend. I lost at least 2 friendships because of my blogs.  As Gibran said, friendship is always a sweet responsibility, never an opportunity. True friends do not ditch us just because we have a different opinion on something, I know that…Still

There are two things we should avoid discussing with our acquaintances if we want to maintain a healthy relationship – Religion and politics; provided both share the same views.  I lost one friend purely because of one of these reasons. I am an Indian and if I try to explain the whys’, I need to talk both politics and religion and that is the difficult part.

If somebody thinks that I am a pro-Jesus guy, I can’t help it. Sorry, I still love Jesus… This does not mean anything else, especially this does NOT mean that I am against any other religion; after all, I am not a Christian myself (provided the meaning of ‘Christian’ is not somebody who love Jesus).

I am not that religious and I am not against any religion. It’s about how things are getting interpreted and what happens when good things fall into the wrong hands…well, as I said, it’s a loooooooooong topic and its kinda mess.

This is the month of Ramadan. Month of asking forgiveness…. So, please forgive me, if I hurt anybody in anyway…It wasn’t personal or intentional…

Yes , I am asking forgiveness from all of you…

 

 

Tuesday, August 24, 2010

Back in the bench

I sat on the bench

With tears in my eyes.

You opened the window

And sung a song for me.

I strolled your trails and

You left a fortuitous rose

In my dreams you came alone

And stole my heart from me

Back on the bench with

Tears in my heart…

You opened the window

And sung a song for him…

 

Thursday, August 19, 2010

My world, Your world...

If this world is for real, there also exists a different world within every one of us which may not be real for others, though we think/feel it is so real. 

We create that world with our personal experiences which might differ from person to person for the same thing, prejudices, judgments, feelings, emotions, fears, desires, jealousy, memories, inhibitions, expectations, imaginations, selfishness, love, lust…

If that world can be imagined as a helmet, we all are wearing helmets of different color, design and smell.

My world might not look like your world. But still, we always have a common world to share…

 

Tuesday, August 17, 2010

Did I or Did I Not?

Are the days flying these days? Some days did, if not all days. Two days back, one of my first cousins' husband passed away. Among the elder relatives I have, he was the only one close to me. I last saw him 9 months back.  

The world around me is changing. Many familiar faces which still flash through my mind do not have any physical from any more. My mother, couple of my cousins, couple of my uncles.. they all became just memories. Since I was with my mother when she passed away, it is comparatively easy to believe that she is no more. But the death of others came to me as phone calls or mails. So, if I visit those houses, I will not be able to see those familiar faces again.  This kind of thoughts are capable of inducing a flavor of fear in us. But they are also capable of giving us some lessons about life. The choice is ours

Sometimes, there is no need for anybody to die to give us a lesson relating to life. Even a broken friendship is capable of doing that. May be the flavor is different, but it still can teach something about  how our thoughts and memories becomes pains and how it hurts.

Today, I could not write what I wished to write.. Today, will I be able to console myself telling 'Hey, they are just thoughts, its just a memory, just relax'? I don't know...

I wanted to write something and I ended up writing something else?… I don't know

But I know one thing for sure – there is pain in my heart and it hurts 

Monday, August 16, 2010

Just a thought

I love you when you bow in your mosque, kneel in your temple, pray in your church. For you and I are sons of one religion, and it is the spirit. - Gibran

Friday, August 13, 2010

Stanfording a Dream

Last weekend, I visited the Stanford University campus (just a drive through). Studying in Stanford was one of my dreams, long ago. But I never thought that this visit would end-up in such a dream which would have given me a heart attack while asleep.

My-sister-in-law tells my father-in-law that I wish to study at Stanford and my father-in-law tells me that he will take care of the expenses!

When I woke up, I pinched myself to make sure that I am not dead but alive and still can feel…

PS: No offence meant to anybody

Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Hold me !

A little girl and her father were crossing a narrow bridge over a river.

The father asked his daughter: 

"Honey, please hold my hand so that you don't fall into the river."

The little girl said:

"No, Dad. You hold my hand."

"What's the difference?" Asked the puzzled father.

"There's a big difference," replied the little girl.

"If I hold your hand and something happens to me, chances are that I may let your hand go. But if you hold my hand, I know for sure that no matter what happens, you will never let my hand go."

Don’t try to hold HIS hand, let HIM hold your hand.

Saturday, August 07, 2010

Friends and Sheep

You have 100 sheep. One of them is missing. What will you do?

Well, you will hardly notice it….

(Not referring to Bible story)

If you have hundreds of friends, you can afford to ignore/avoid a couple of them, you won’t feel much difference