Being God !

God, this is unfair, yes, I call it unfair.
I know you have your own logic, but
Do you think I can’t call it unfair?
Else you prove that I am wrong.

But I have a request to you.
Please don’t try to prove it.
I know you can prove it, but
Do you want to hurt me?

You already saw me getting hurt.
I know that you don’t want it again.
You won’t try to prove anything
So mum is the word for you.

But still, I want to ask you. Why did?
You could have avoided it.
Well, don’t try to answer me.
God, I might ask it all again

And I don’t want you to answer me!
I want to sit on your lap, like a child.
I might argue or fight with you.
But you just smile and look at me

Please take your magic wand
If you don’t have, make it now
But I want you to use a magic wand
And make it happen this very moment

Being God is not easy, but
I know you are God !

I am not Modern

The other day, during a chat conversation, a friend of mine used a swear word. This was for the first time somebody using that with me and hence it was a shock for me. Bad words from a woman’s mouth is not a pleasant thing to hear. She immediately said sorry but it wasn’t that easy for me to digest. After that I explained to her why it was difficult for me to digest it. And in reply, she said

“Jay you have to be modern”

If being modern is dressing like a gentleman and using swear words, sorry, I don’t want to be modern.

There are many things in our life which we can not buy using our money power (for other things there is Master Card…hahahaahaha)

Astrology

I don’t know when I wrote about astrology. Some years ago I wrote about astrology. May be it was a mail to somebody. Now I don’t remember. But it was a bit detailed one and now I don’t know where that mail (or whatever) is.

But the other day, once again astrology came into discussion. Since that talk was a for a few minutes, I dropped the idea of explaining it and decided to mail my friend. I did not understand the real tone when that person talked about astrology. Was is sarcastic? Teasing? Skeptical? I still don’t know.

I had studied astrology for a very small time. But I am not a great follower of it. I don’t have the habit of consulting an astrologer for everything I do. I haven’t even seen an astrologer for the past 12-14 years. But still I wont say astrology is all nonsense coz, it actually makes some sense. Am not talking about its accuracy and all. But its not fully inaccurate. If we know the exact date, time and place of birth person, an accomplished astrologer can predict a lot of things with somewhat accuracy. But some of these predictions can be altered by that person by his/her faith and will power.

Why are the people around us are not all the same? Why our fingers, nails, skin, hair and many other characteristics different? Is this all coincidence? I don’t think so.

Our ancestors might have observed too much coincidence happening around them and then they might have become curious about it and they might have kept a record of their observations and the result was the origin of astrology. I don’t know the history but when I write this, that is what came into my mind.

For the time being, I will just post the mail I wrote to that person, the other day. This is not a fully explained one and I leaves some space for that person to think.

......... * * * ...........

If I say there is a place called ‘ooty’, what will be your response? I expect you to say ‘ I don’t know’ and not ‘no, there is no such place’.

If you google for ooty, you get more than 1,220,000 results for ooty coz its such a known place in India (and somewhat abroad too). One not knowing doesn’t mean that there is no such place. I hope you got my point. And this is applicable to everybody , including me, for almost every aspect in our life. Our ignorance about something is not a proof of non existence of something. (And I expect you to use this sentence against me, sometime in future….coz that is what usually people do).

Can you prove to an atheist that God exists? No, you can’t. I believe in God but can I prove it to another? Nope. There are many people in the God business who ‘creates’ miracles (at their will, wish, time, sked etc) and makes millions. Even such ‘professionals’ can’t prove to an atheist that God exists.

And may be that is one reason why religions are also called ‘faith’. Coz, it’s just a mind game and it all ‘depends’ on your faith. Ever heard of a thief bitten to death by a snake while stealing? I personally know many incidents where agricultural crops being got stolen at night where there are lots of snakes too. And why is it so? Where did this gentleman God go?

Why am I talking about religion? May be I have some reasons…hehehe

Same thing is applicable to astrology. Somebody’s ignorance or skeptical view about it doesn’t make it foolish or stupid. (You won’t believe that an astrologer told me that my sister’s first child died, without him knowing anything about me or my family. He lived hundreds of miles away and I met him accidentally). Coz, it has man’s thousands of years of observation about the nature/universe. Why our finger prints/shape/lines are different? Do you think a palmist is all fake and a finger print expert is right?

Fortunately for the human race, there are people who learn from nature and think beyond ‘books’, even now.

If I take lots of effort to explain astrology, it’s a total waste of our time, that too me not being an expert. But still, you are my friend and hence I have some time for you. So, I just want to give you some clues.

One of the greatest (western) astrologer of all times was a Christian, do you know that? William John Warner, who is known as Cheiro. Same goes to Linda.

Do you know how tides happen? If that silly moon can influence such abundant water, do you think that it can not influence you? Do you know from where the word Lunatic originated and why? If you know any asthma patient, go and ask them what happens when the full moon comes. I suspect, even you might have been under the influence of it and did not observe (once you said you became sad without any reason).Moon can make one hyperactive, depressed, violent, trigger migraine headaches and asthma…..astrologers speak in a different language and science speak in a different language. But many a times, what both say are same thing.

(what is different language? Once there was a king. He wanted to know when he will die. So, he called one astrologer and asked. Astrologer predicted his death within a month and the king cut the astrologer’s head and laughed – ‘ fool, he didn’t even know his own fate’. Then he called another astrologer and the astrologer said this way – ‘ Oh King, I don’t see any death, but I see the prince becoming King, so it’s a happy moment’ . And the king rewarded him. But the king died and the prince became the king. This is what I mean by ‘different language’ )

Science understood this and now calls this as ‘Full Moon Ion Effect’. I know the scientific side if this. You can ask me, if you are genuinely interested. I have seen some people around me, who hesitate to learn something coz they have a fear that the knowledge will destroy their faith. This is not true. One needs to start from the religion and grow to spirituality (no need for anyone to change his/her faith). And science and spirituality goes hand in hand. It complements each other.

The other day I talked about bacteria in our mouth. It has no idea where it lives. Lets divert a little from there.

(removed some part and here I talks about that person’s identity with respect to the place of living)

.....Then you will grow to asian, “earthtian”, “solar systian”, “milky wayian” and so on…..think as BIG as you can…travel at light speed and cover as much as you can….are you just a (person's identity based on nationality)?

If somebody calls you up now (from thousand of miles away) and abuse/scold you, you will get irritated and you will transfer that negativity to others around you (you might get angry at them etc). So, didn’t they influence you? How does a prayer work? How does your prayer influence me? Now combine the ability to influence and what you really are and now you have the answer.

God did not create those big balls just for fun or for a different ball game. It has a purpose and role to perform in this universe.

( Removed some personally identifiable contents)

Just be open and look at the moon with love and acceptance….it might even talk to you, who knows?

Merry Christmas !!

The Christmas is over now. This year’s Christmas was very special for me. As many of my friends know, I am not a Christian, still this year’s Christmas was really special. May be I wont forget it till I die. I could not spend this time with any of my friends, personally. But this was the year that I got lots and lots of wishes. And I am very much thankful to Friendster, my social network portal, for such thing to happen. Am sooooo happy about it. Also, I never got a chance in my life to wish this many friends, in my life.

I was lucky to be called (fone) and to call to exchange wishes. I got touched. Some of my friends were in touch with me, though they were busy.

There came Santa in our place too and I gifted my son with a book and card through Santa, which made him so happy.

My Christmas Eve too was one of the most memorable moments. We had a dinner though my son wasn’t feeling well. And a friend of mine was in touch with me, till late night (and wee morning at the other end). I am touched, again.

Apart from these greetings, I even got a greeting card for real.

Friends, thank you all for giving me a memorable day (days may be, coz every day I got new greetings). God bless you all !

My First Job!

What was my first job? I started earning by giving tuitions. This was mainly to manage the petrol cost of my then mobike. ( a Bajaj M-50).



This was during my first year graduation. I became bit popular, as a teacher, and I got lots of students but I did not take much. Just two students. Mainly coz, I was into many other social activities and I wanted to make only a small sum to manage my petrol cost.

It can’t be considered as a job, rite? Well, then my first job was with guy. This guy was a friend of one of my friends (who is no more). And thus he became my acquaintance. He took an agency to market an electronic hobby kit and was looking for a guy to manage his paper works. On my friend’s suggestion, I took up the job and I was asked to report to his house. This was just after me giving my last exam and before results.

What I saw was just a house. He didn’t even have a separate room for his office. Kits are lying at one room and I was offered a seat somewhere else. Why he preferred me? I was doing my graduation in Accounting but I had a fair idea about electronics too. So he gave me a kit to get familiarized with.

He was lucky that there came an article in the local news paper about this electronic kit. And he was the only agent in that area. Thus there came lots of inquiry letters and my first assignment was to answer them all. Before finishing it, he asked me to write an article about his product. I wrote an article and we both went to one news paper office and handed it over. I was sure that they will not publish it coz, another paper already mentioned about this product (as I mentioned earlier). News paper people are looking for unique news for them else we need to pay and publish it. I did not see them publishing my write up. (my first published work was a letter to the editor..hahaha)

I used my bike for his marketing visits and to post office for sending parcels, for which he put petrol. 3-4 days left….once or twice I had lunch from his house. My salary was fixed as 300 bucks per month.

May be on the fifth day, he came out the idea to visit the Government Engineering College and give a demo. That college was a collection of brains. And I remember that, during that time, some of the students came out with an assignment on robotics which gathered appreciation. I said ok. And?

Next day, I did not turn up. He was a very thick skinned man but not me. My employer waited for two days and then contacted my friend and came to know that I have given up the job. He offered to pay the salary for those days which I did not accept.

So, I did not get paid for my first job…huhuhu

New Year Gifts !

What has happened to me? I have never been like this. Three mails are pending. One to one of my cousins and two to my friends. Usually I do reply within a day or two. Yes, it is true that I was bit lazy than busy, these days.

“Jay, friends are like gifts”

Said one of my friends and it sounded true to me. This is Christmas/New Year time, a big festive time and a time of exchanging gifts. God was very kind to gift me with friends this month, both new and old.

I had a friend, may be a friend whom I trusted very much and I lost him about 7 years ago. He gave me a surprise call this weekend. It was he who broke the friendship and now he joined it. And I even talked to his mom who was a mother figure for me too. We were colleagues and now he is in a very good position and traveled to US and UK, officially. I got updated that the company I was working with, before moving to this city, grown like a giant and now has got 90 branches including one at Dubai.

I happened to talk to a couple of friends in Philippines. I used to talk about a friend of mine with whom I spent many Christmas…I called him up and did not hesitate to admit that I missed him. A lost friendster friend of mine came back. I got some new friends too.

Last Saturday I visited my brother-in-law. To see his seven month old daughter. This baby had some ‘issues’ with me. Usually babies like me. It all started when I took her without her knowing and seeing my face all of a sudden. I knew it that we are not supposed to take a baby like that….. But this time she was very friendly and allowed me to take her and she was all smiles and it was like she paying it back with interest.

I don’t know how many of my friends miss me. Comments are not always truthful. (No offence meant to anybody but just after adding as friend, if somebody post ‘ You are my best friend’ , its bit hard to digest). But I have a feeling that some of them like me, proving that friendship is beyond country, culture and religion. I don’t know whether they miss me or not, I don’t know whether they love me (as a friend) or not…but isn’t a good feeling to know that somebody missed you?

On the other side, two of my friends fell ill. One of them is yet to recover, fully. It is not at all a good feeling to know that one of our friends fell ill. But I think, they are leaving the unwanted things behind and getting ready for the New Year..May be the New Year has more good things to offer to them..

So, so far, this month connected me to many of my friends. Dear friends, you are all gifts to me…Thank you all for giving me a feeling that I too have somebody in this world..

Stress

Stress has become part and parcel of our life. What happens when you are stressed out? Headache? Not just headache. For example, look at this:

Me sitting in front of the doc, about seven years ago


Me: Doctor, I cant see properly…. I am not able to see even you properly…

Doc: What happened? Anything wrong with your eyes?

Me: No, I don’t think so.

I could make out that he was staring at me (his trademark) Then he checks my eyes first, then my BP

Doc : You have very high BP…..

Then we discuss and I goes out of the clinic with a prescription.

Yes, when you are stressed out and if you think that it started affecting your day to day life, its high time you address it. Medication works for the short term (and to get an immediate relief) and Meditation/Yoga is the best for the long run.

If you are stressed out, you could face the following issues:

Headache
Chest pain
Pounding heart
High blood pressure
Shortness of breath
Muscle aches
Back pain
Clenched jaws
Tooth grinding
Stomach upset (including ulcer)
Constipation
Diarrhea
Increased sweating
Tiredness
Sleep problems
Weight gain or loss
Sex related problems
Skin breakouts
Anxiety
Restlessness
Worrying
Irritability
Depression
Sadness
Anger
Mood swings
Job dissatisfaction
Feeling insecure
Confusion
Burnout
Forgetfulness
Resentment
Guilt
Inability to concentrate
Seeing only the negatives
Overeating
Under eating
Angry outbursts
Drug abuse
Excessive drinking
Increased smoking
Social withdrawal
Crying spells
Relationship conflicts
Decreased productivity
Blaming others

Is God Male?

Is there any male God sitting above us? A Father? With male sex organs? Or ‘He’ has got female sex organs too? A hermaphrodite? Or genderless?

Why cant God be a She? After all it’s God who created or ‘gave birth’ to this universe.

This world is male dominated, without any doubt. Rama, Krishna (there are female deities in Hinduism, but most of the teachings are from male side), Jesus, Buddha, Mohammed, all the authors of the Bible, the author of Mahabharat, Ramayan, Koran …..its a list of males. That is the only reason why God became He.

Some religion’s idea of heaven is fully male dominated (full of beautiful women, grapes… and a place where man has his say) .

After all, Bible says, God created mankind in his image. And we can see that mankind includes female (as per the Bible, its not just the physical feature which is considered as the ‘image’, I understand that). So it is not a HE. We (at least I ) use He for easy addressing.

Hinduism considers God (Brahman) as formless, omnipresent, omnipotent, immanent and pure consciousness . I think Islam also has similar view (the form aspect) about Allah. And what about Christianity?

“In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God and the Word was God”

John 1:1

“God is spirit, and those who worship Him must worship in spirit and truth”

John 4:24

How does a spirit look like, as per Bible? Jesus says:

"Behold my hands and my feet, that it is I myself. Handle me and see, for a spirit does not have flesh and bones as you see I have."

Luke 24:39


So, there is no scope for confusion. The scriptures and common sense agrees at least here. God is not male.

God is sprit or in other words, a form of energy. And thus the first law of thermodynamics, the law of conservation of energy, is applicable to Him

“Energy can neither be created nor be destroyed”

So?

So, dont ask me who created God...

Why Not Christmas?

After a long time’s break, once again religion came for a discussion. The subject that I don’t prefer for a discussion (with people who don’t know me well, and vice versa).

But it wasn’t totally unexpected. I was sure that this person will talk religion one day or other.

Its part of them, people who are too much into religion. They might bring religion between everything, even between friendships. May be such people keep their kind of people around them.

It all started like this

“do you celebrate Christmas?”

And I answered by asking another question, since she knew that I am not a Christian.

“why should we?”

Then comes this

“why not” and

“Christmas is about Christ and Christ is God……….”

She also added:

“you celebrate your birthday right? and during Christmas we remember God's reincarnation, God becoming human being”

Nicely put but to a wrong person, I think. I was a person who used to spend my Christmas with my Christian friends and I have never negated celebrating it. What I did not like is the attitude of imposing it on to people of other faith. Had she invited me to celebrate it, I would have been sooo happy to hear that.



During my childhood, I used to buy and send lots of Christmas cards. Many a times, a Christian friend of my mom used to bring a cake for us. Then Christmas became my best friend’s first festival. Thus Christmas always was part of me.

But when I asked

“do you celebrate Krishna jayanti?” , I did not get any answer. When I mentioned Rama, Krishna, Shiva, Vishnu etc. She asked

“did he/she became human?”

This question definitely shows how much she knew about my culture. Is ignorance bliss? Not in this context.


(Btw, if I get a chance to celebrate Christmas with her, I would definitely do that, but I did not tell her that ..hehehehe… I have another reason – long ago I wrote that I wish to spend this Christmas with somebody but that person rejected that offer)

If I say there exists a place called ‘Ulsoor’ , in what way my foreign friends should react? I expect

“I don’t know” and NOT “No, there can’t be such a place”.

You does not knowing something doesn’t mean that there is no such thing. The second answer shows ignorance.

I had touched the subject religion in some of my earlier blogs. But that person hesitated to read my blogs. She even hesitated to know about other religion and its scripture (I think this would have given a better idea about Jesus). The typical expression from a staunch religious person.

If Christ can be God, why cant Krishna? Why not Allah? Why not Buddha? Whats wrong with the Jewish God?

And there is a common thing about all religions. If an atheist asks:

“Can you prove that God exists?”

None of us can prove it, including those who are in the miracle creation business.


I started writing this blog in the noon and had lots of thing in mind to write about. I even did some research.

But am I angry with that friend of mine? Not at all. Its coz her that I did some research, and in that process I had to read Bible. So, in fact I am thankful to her.


It is believed that Jesus did visit India and practice yoga. If Jesus visited India (He did not visit my friend's country), he should have some reason. He might have heard of its spiritual richness. His style of telling parables is just like our Upanishads, which originated thousands of years before Jesus.

As I said, I had lots in my mind but that time another friend of mine said ‘Hi’ to me. She too was from the previous friend’s country and she too was a Catholic, just like her. We happened to talk abut Christmas. Better put, I dragged this subject to find out her view. She too asked same question.

“why you don’t celebrate Christmas?”

I said, “ you people don’t celebrate Krishna Jayanthi, the birthday of Krishna, in the same way, we don’t celebrate Christmas”

She just said “ I see”

Then I asked why didn’t she go further (than ‘I see’) and her answer was

“ I respect other people’s faith”

She is not too much into religious activities. She believes in Jesus, she reads Bible, she goes to church, and she attends mass. But what I saw was maturity. I had seen a similar maturity even from a teenage friend of mine too. But the common thing was she too was not too much into religion.

To understand Jesus, there is no need to become a Christian by birth, there is no need to get converted, there is no need to attend mass, there is no need to attend meetings and gatherings and spiritual boost-up camps. But you need one thing for sure, a heart!!! (well, not just a physical organ)

Heart symbolizes love and Jesus speaks that language.

Now, can my ‘religious’ friend tell me why Jesus shows that hand symbol? Is that his way of saying hi?

I wish to post this today itself and its getting late. So I wish to end this post with the following quotes from the Bible, which I happened to read today.

“This is my commandment that you love one another as I have loved you”

“Greater love has no one than this, than to lay down one’s life for his friends”

John 15:12-13

(And after a few verses later comes a greatest secret reveled by Jesus and of course through symbols)

Get Well Soon!

A friend of mine called me ‘a special friend’. What is a special friend? I did not ask that person why I am special. Anyway I was happy to hear that. Are all of my friends the same type? Not at all. They all have got their uniqueness and thus they are special too. Some are extra ordinarily special. Why?

If somebody says I am their best friend and when I cry they also cry, without knowing me, isn’t that very special? Yes, its fake I understand. But sometimes this makes me laugh and feel light.

Profession wise also many of them are different. CPA, Grocer, Student, Call Center (related), Scientist, Housewife, Administrative staff, Sales , Engineer…..and one of them is even a beauty competition pageant too.

* * * * *

Today was my son’s Sports Day at school. The school does not have a play ground/stadium, so, they booked a stadium to conduct the events. Since my son was part of the ‘display’ (sort of PT Drill), I was there at the stadium till noon, from early morning. Seeing all these students, events and all gave me a nostalgic feeling (this is for the first time me attending his sports day). This also happened to be my Karate practice ground(when I used to practice it, about three-four years ago). Today was Thursday and it was a Karate day. Since the ground was booked by school, I did not see them coming to the ground for jogging. That too was a nostalgic feeling.

* * * * *

Two of my friends are not feeling well. One is recovering fast and another one seems to be bit slow in the recovery process. Not pleasant a news. My readers, please pray for them.

GET WELL SOON, both of you…. God bless!!

A Prayer for Weight Loss

Ever wondered why some people cant reduce weight even though they skip breakfast? It happened with one of my friends. Its simple. She used to skip breakfast but used to take decent lunch. What happens here is, since the stomach is empty for about 6 hours, we might feel more hungry and hence we might eat more. And what happens when we have a heavy lunch? We might feel bit drowsy. And if we are at work, this will certainly affect our productivity. The easy way to control over eating is to have a cup of water before having meal.

So it is not wise to skip break fast. Eat moderately. There is no need to skip any meal if we want to lose weight. All we need to do is to have an eye on what we eat. And yes, workouts. Do that also wisely.

* * * *

Today I got a forwarded mail. It was a prayer. The mail asks us to do that prayer and forward it. The subject line had a number, the count. When we forward it, add one to the number. When I got the mail, it was forwarded about 10 times. And what was the number?

1,305,089,983,278

And what is the world population?

6,635,466,609 !!!!

Can’t these people avoid cheating at least in things related to God? May be some people think that if they are doing some religious activity, they can do it in any way. Many people got converted to another faith at gun point. Some people believe that if they kill a person of the other religion, they get a place in the heaven. What a pity !!!

When you are doing God related stuffs (or better put - stuffs carried out by “religious” people who carry out religion related acts) , be more truthful. Be truthful to God and understand that everything in this universe is created by God and nobody is superior or inferior to anybody. Even every faith has its place. May be that is the reason why there exists hundreds of faith groups in a single religion which has only one common scripture book (this always was/is a wonder to me)

Where are my blogs?

Was my today a bad day? I don’t know. Today was/is very cold, that I know. It looked like a bad day. But was it really? Or was it a bad day for some others? It was a bad day for at least a couple of my friends. Sometimes, may be, ignorance is bliss

I was still sleepy when I woke up. It was a lazy day than a bad day. I was tired than worried.

Now that the list of ‘to be blogged’ is getting longer.

Waiting for a situation is more fearful than actually facing the situation. Same about fear of losing something/someone. Living through fear is more painful than facing the reality.

Yesterday I was worried about my laptop and its DVD drive. Today it was something else that I got to worry about.

I remember my doc’s words when I asked on an incidence

“So, there is no need to worry?”

“I don’t see any reason. But if you want, you can worry”

(He takes that freedom with me to joke in such a way). So, I better not to worry.

In a chain mail, I was asked to accept Jesus as my savior. Not only that. I was asked to forward it to 10 more people. And the mail tells us to not to care about what the recipient thinks about it. Nice attitude. Jesus asked people to care about others!! I did not give a reply to that mail since I thought it might be waste of time. But still I feel like giving a reply asking them to take Him to their heart than forwarding mails.

Today I am forgetful. I thought of writing something and I forgot what it is. At some point of time I had too many topics in hand and had confusion as to which topic I should take first. Yesterday my mind was full of blogs…..where does it go? Blogs, blogs, where are you?

A BloodLetter Day !

I wrote about friendship many times. Do we get hurt in friendships? Yes, sometimes we do. When our close friends hurt us, it goes deep. And what do we do when we finds that we have hurt one of our friends? We might say sorry. That’s all? Then I have a different story to tell.

There was a guy and he had a friend, a girl. He considered her as his best friend. But he wasn’t sure whether this girl considers him as her best friend. But she never told the other way and she liked him.

This guy was working in a factory as an accountant when this incident happened. He did not like that environment. It was noisy and dusty and yes, there were mosquitoes too. The girl was doing her pharmacy diploma.

Though this guy was an accountant, he was good at science. So, when this girl was absent in the college, she used to bring somebody’s notes and used to ask this guy to copy it for her. Or some notes related work. This girl was an active Christian community worker and a good singer with a Gospel singing troupe.

One day this guy had a bad day at work. He came back home in a bad mood with a head ache and there she comes. Usually her presence was helpful to ease his mind, but not that day. She came with a bunch of books and gave it to him and asked him to copy. But he asked:

“What do you think of me?, your servant?”

Girl became very sad, tears came out of her eyes, yes she cried.

“I am going” she said

He did not say anything in reply, but he wished she stayed for a while more. But she left.

This guy became very sad. And there came this guilty feeling for hurting her. What can he do now? Many a times he had crazy ideas. Once he wrote a total nonsense story on the side of a birthday greeting card and gave it to that girl’s sister, which made the whole family laugh.

But this is not a time for a story. And there is this guilty feeling. He hurt his best friend, so the apology also should be best. He thought of writing a letter saying sorry.

He took a piece of paper, a pen which had no ink and a razor blade. He cut his finger with the blade, dipped the pen in the blood and wrote a ‘bloody’ apology. It started like this :

"I am writing this with my blood......"

And he posted it instead of handing it directly over to her.

They weren’t seeing each other for days. And one day he saw she rushing to his door. She did not enter his house but stood outside, on the road (house was adjacent to road) and asked him.

“Why did you do that? You know what happened? I was in the college when the post came. Mummy received the post and she thought it was from the community, since the envelope you used was very much similar to the one we used to get from my community.”

He stood thunderstruck. She added;

“Mummy asked me to not to come to your house”

“OK, I will talk to mummy”, he said. He also used to address that lady as mummy.

“Noooo”

“Yes, I need to explain to her….ok, I will write another letter and you give that to mummy, ok? Come tomorrow” he said

He wrote another letter to mummy explaining how his day was at work and how he felt guilty when he made her daughter cry. And yes, he was good at writing letters.

Finally the letter reaches mummy. The next day, he met mummy on the road. From a long distance itself they exchanged a smile.

“Mummy!, is everything clear now?’ he asked and she said;

“Yes”

They both smiled, a kind of a smile!!!!

‘G’, where are you?

My 100th Post!!

What to say?

Jai Guru Dev!!!

God bless you!!!

Show Your Face!

One difference between animals and humans are ‘faces’. We humans have multiple faces hidden within us. Many a times we pretend. When we pretend we are hiding the ‘that time’ true face with a mask. Anybody seen a dog showing faces? Pretending? Nope.

Thus we might have showed/worn so many faces in our life. But most of us won’t take any effort to look back into the faces we have/had/made. We see the world through two eyes. But these eyes don’t see each other (set aside the mirror). Though not in the same way, but in a similar way, these faces don’t see each other. Or may be we ourselves might not see these faces, together.

So, can’t we ever see them? And what happens when we see all our faces?

We see them when we go deep within us and reach closer to our Self. We meet all of them together. There these faces lose its identity and you will remain as the Self.

My Best Friend!!

I forgot to add one more topic that I happened to discuss last week – Best friend (and yes a little about boy friend too).

When I got asked ‘who is your best friend in real?’, I wasn’t able to give an immediate answer, though one name jumped into my mind...

It was like this, a friend of mine talks about being sad and I give a suggestion to talk to her best friend. Then comes the answer that, this person doesn’t have any best friend. It wasn’t a shock for me, but I actually thought she might have one, since she had lots of friends.

She never felt the need for having a best friend…Now one thing is becoming more clearer. Many people in this world don’t understand friendship or may be the need for a friendship. Many of then never got any chance to think in that direction since they always had many people around them. May be they gets acquainted with many people and they call them as friends.

Then why I wasn’t able to answer? Her question was ‘who is your best friend in real?’…Yes, in real…

As I have written somewhere, sometime ago, a best friend is a friend with whom we are most comfortable with. And the practical reality is that there is no point in having a 'one- way best friend' relation and calling him/her as your best friend.

Why?

One might be comfortable with the other and what about the other person? What if he/she is not comfortable in the same way? Within this ‘comfort’ level comes the likeness or love , trust, care, understanding etc.

So, I said, ‘look, presently, what I have around me are virtual friends’.

But though I said that, I thought at least some of my virtual friends might be happy to meet me in person.

Today that thought came again in my mind for a recheck…

Does it mean that virtual friends can’t be best friends?

I still haven’t lost my hope.

Another Week Gone!

There goes one more week. Sometimes it looks like the time flies. These days I am not putting much effort to keep my blog very alive. This happened coz, I put my effort on brushing up some of my software lessons, added some more applications to my software collections(this again required some research), took some personal time to help some of my friends who faced some computer related issues, spend some time with my net friends….(these are the things that came into my mind).

I talked/listened to about many things, like computer (related), marriage, number of kids we need to have, pregnancy and family planning methods, circumcision, reading habits, migration to Canada, etc ….

But there was one thing (other than software) which came repeatedly in many conversations, Religion.

It gave an idea about how people are ‘bound’ by religion. Some of them can’t put nail polish since their religion doesn’t permit it. Some of them are not permitted to use condoms, some of the are not allowed to abort an unwanted pregnancy, some of them are not permitted to use any birth control methods….and most interestingly, someone said ‘ premarital sex is considered as a mortal sin in our community’, which was very interesting (coz, that person’s country is world’s one of the top sex tourism place; a country where lots of pre marital pregnancy happens, where abt 23% (as per 2004 survey of UNESCO – youth aged between 15 to 24 years) of the young indulge in sex before marriage and where this person’s religion has an 80- 85% domination among the population!!!!)

Some people use religious beliefs very 'conveniently'.

I am happy that I gave enough logic/moral support to one of my friends to go ahead with a birth control method. These days, brining up a child is not easy but very expensive. And being a parent has the responsibility to give good/best education and other amenities to our child. If we ‘produce’ children like dogs or pigs, just coz religion doesn’t allow us to do a birth control, will the religions fund the education? Will the religion fund all the upbringing cost? Nope. And the notable part is, the attitude of the people and government in developed countries are different. We need to have a modern view.

Yes, in olden days, among farmer families, they had many children. This was mainly to avail cheaper labor by using the children (I dont mean kids) to help them. Education wasn’t a big issue then.

Religion and its scriptures should help humans to ‘open the eyes’ and not to put a blind.

An Ancient Friendship!

There are lots of friendship stories in Indian mythologies. They might not be just stories for stories. Like the one I am going to tell.

This is from Krishna’s life. When he was a student (Those days it was the Gurukula system, the olden day boarding school system where the student lives with the Guru-teacher- till he finishes his learning), he had a buddy called Kuchela. They both were from extremely opposite financial background.

When the studies were over, they part. Krishna becomes the King and Kuchela lives in poverty. His wife used to tell him

‘ The King is your friend, why don’t you go to him and ask for help?’

But Kuchela always had a hesitation, or may be he had a complex. How can he visit his friend - who is the King lives in luxury and wears the best – wearing his torn dress? And he wished to give him some present, but he had nothing.

But finally, Kuchela decided to visit Krishna. There went thousand thoughts inside his mind….will Krishna identify him? What if he ignores him? What if he cant get through the guards and meet Krishna?.......

He told his wife that he want to carry something as gift. There weren’t anything valuable left in that house and his wife made puffed/beaten rice out of some grains left in the house. Next day morning, Kuchela went to the palace. But he had a guilty feeling for taking that beaten rice with him as a gift to the King, who eats all the delicious dish. What if he won’t eat? What if he thorough it out?

When he reached the palace, Krishna was looking out through one of the windows and he saw Kuchela.

What did he do? Did let him in? Did he avoid him coz he was poor and dressed like a beggar? Was he ashamed of admitting such a man as his friend, that too openly? Or did he allow him to enter the palace and show his face (while Krishna sitting in the throne) ?

Krishna ran out of the palace in ecstasy and as soon as he met him he hugged him, though Kuchela was all sweaty. And Krishna grabbed the shabby pack of puffed rice and ate it just in front of him, standing where he was. Tears of happiness came out of Kuchela’s eyes.

(And of course, the King helped his childhood friend)

How beautiful friendships are, isn’t it?

A Week Ago

No posts for many days….huhuhu

This doesn’t mean that nothing happened or my brain is dead. I was after many other things which included downloading some software and exploring them and reading some books. Well, I wasted a lot of time also, but sometimes it happens in our life, not being productive. In between, there were cricket matches played between India and Pakistan (India won the series though one more match is left, with a lead of 3-1 in the 5 match one day series).

One of my friends fell ill during this period. But she escaped from a near pneumonia. So, it’s a mixed feeling leaving a relief as the final output.

Me as well as my country got teased by some of my friends. I even had a friend who believed we Indians don’t have toilets at home! Another person did not believe that I live in 11th floor (coz she thinks there are no high rise buildings in India!!!). Then I thought of writing something about India. That blog got written only in my mind.

A Christian friend justified drinking alcoholic beverages. Then I thought about Jesus. I never heard that he ever was drunk. I have read another interesting thing about the wine Jesus made, when he performed his first miracle - some scholars said it wasn’t fermented wine.

For the first time, somebody did not laugh at my arranged marriage. But it even brought that person think about how Isaac and Rebecca got married. And even agreed with me when I said – as per Bible, love starts after marriage and not ‘first you love and then you marry’. This was a surprise thing happed during these period.

I read the ‘Tuesdays with Morrie’, during this period. This is one of the books which many people consider as their favorite one, in my friendship/social network portal. But after reading this book, I really wondered why or what aspect those people found interesting in this book, since it had multiple dimensions and I had some idea about many of them (who like this book). I might write about this book later.

It was Deepavali festival during this period. And I was greeted by some of my (non Indian) friends which was a real surprise for me.

I happened to think about the gender of God. I could not convert those thoughts into typed words. But I will be writing about it, very soon.

There also was a leading-to-nowhere discussion about vegetarianism, rebirth and organ donation. We were at the opposite sides minus the friendship. Me a veg, doesn’t object the re-birth theory, and don’t have any problem in donating organs. And at the other end it was a person who had the opposite views.

Somebody (our acquaintance) asks lot of things about you. Does it show the person’s concern/love/friendship/care for you?

Well, sometimes it can be mere curiosity. Yup, this was one of the thoughts that revisited me this week

Jonathan Livingston Seagull

Long ago, I used to write Book Reviews in an (well known) online store portal. And I wasn’t a blogger that time. I thought I will post (repost?) a couple of them here in this blog.

I will start with a the book ‘Jonathan Livingston Seagull by Richard Bach. I felt like adding some more , but I didnt...

Find that perfection, May 20, 2005

First published in 1973 and still people reads it. And that tells it. You might get a glimpse of Jesus in this book...This book teaches:

- Don't think that you are limited
- Don't give up - Love ` your flock'
- Don't just try but feel
- don't just try to find who you are but understand that you are that " ....you must begin by knowing that you have already arrived.."

- The real question of why are we here...

" do you have any idea how many lives we must have gone through before we even got the first idea that there is more to life than eating, or fighting, or power in the Flock? A thousand lives."

" ...and another hundred again to get the idea that our purpose for living is to find that perfection and show it forth"

Not just that, I just mentioned a few.

I personally love photography; I own two good cameras too. But do we really need this much of gull photos in this book just to add more pages and price? Yes, it holds some values and you will like reading this book. (If your likeness is Biology, don't choose Trigonometry to avoid disappointment)

Science and Spirituality

We stand at a neutral level, when we are at a ‘nothing doing’ state. We, being human, we can look outwards as well as inwards. You see unknown things/mysteries at both ways. When we go deeper and deeper into the external mysteries it becomes science. When we go deeper and deeper into our self, it is spirituality. So, science and spirituality goes hand in hand and not the other way.

Everything Has Its TIME !

A friend of mine told me she will kill me…. In another context I said about buddy time and death.

But it was always as a joke. Death was one thing I happened to think about this week. So what is the serious part in it?

When I took up the Bible lessons, they mostly dealt with New Testament. But since the Bible I bought was a complete one (there are many communities which distribute only New Testament and I had a couple of such versions), I was bit curious about the Old Testament. And I had this thought of ‘how can Bible be complete without Genesis?’ I should have asked this to my then best friend who believed only in New Testament (and considered the Pope as antichrist!). I don’t know why I did not ask…Why? Why? Why?

One of my favorite from Old Testament is Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 which reads as follows:

To everything there is a season,
A time to every purpose under heaven:

A time to be born, and
A time to die;
A time to plant, and
A time to pluck
What is planted;

A time to kill, and
A time to heal;
A time to break down, and
A time to build up;

A time to weep, and
A time to laugh;
A time to mourn, and
A time to dance;

A time to cast away stones, and
A time to gather stones;
A time to embrace, and
A time to refrain from embracing;

A time to gain, and
A time to lose;
A time to keep, and
A time to throw away;

A time to tear, and
A time to sew;
A time to keep silence, and
A time to speak;

A time to love, and
A time to hate;
A time of war; and
A time of peace.


So there is a time to die. This thought brought me to another place. Where there is Time and where there is Death. This is from one of the stories from India.

Maharishi (great sage) Vyasa (it is he who divided the Vedas into four) had a devoted pupil. One day he decided to reward him and hence asked

“What do you want?”

“I just want to know when I will die” said the pupil

Vyasa got surprised by his student’s wish and he said

“I will take you to the Lord of Death and you ask this directly to him”

Thus they went to the Lord of the Death, Yama.

But Yama too got surprised by his wish and said:

“I am sorry, It is true that I take away life but it is not me who decides when to do that. I am informed by Lord of the Causes.”

So, they all went to the Lord of Causes and asked the question. He said :

“I too am sorry and it is Lord of Time that tells me and so, we better go to him and ask”

All the time the disciple was last of the retinue since others were highly respected ones.

So, they all went together to meet the Lord of Time, Kal Purush. Lord of Causes told him why they came there.

“Where is the disciple?” asked Kal Purush

They all looked behind and the disciple was missing and found dead at the door step.

So, they asked for an explanation

“It was fated that when he brings all of you here, he will die!!” said Lord of Time…….


Anyway, I don’t think I will die just after posting this blog !!

Love and Lust

Love ................................Lust

Sacrifice ...................................Hold
Unselfish .................................Selfish
Subjective................................Objective
Delivers ...................................Demands
Leeds to solace .......................Leeds to suffering
Compassion .............................Contempt
Divine .....................................Human

Recurrent Aphthous Stomatitis - RAS

For the past couple of days, I was nursing a mouth ulcer. So this mail came into my mind. This I wrote one year ago to somebody.

*****

Hi <>

.................................

I used to get it frequently (ie, RAS, Recurrent Aphthous Stomatitis), but not these days. Though you asked what I do, actually, it doesn't matter what I do since the cause ( and hence the tretment) is different. Since I had/get this condition, I read a lot (abt most of the ulcers) and hence can provide some useful info. There is no single cause for this. Many people might have their own trigger for this, apart from the physical trauma. Like, in many women hormonal change, in some pple, change or tooth paste, in some vitamin deficiency ( Folic acid or B12 or Iron, usually), sudden stress, allergy to gluten ( a protein present in wheat etc)………

As on today, nobody knows what the exact cause of mouth ulcer is. There are some indirect causes like brush abrasion, accident bites etc which are called the physical trauma (in my case this biting is the main culprit these days). You can find out many many other reasons like these. If physical trauma is not the cause, in your case, then there is something to do with what you eat and drink. Many scientists believe that it has something to do with over reaction of our own body's immune system, in some people like you and me (and not some one like Latha.) From my past 30 years of observation, I observed that it has also something do with your stomach/ bowl movement. Constipation can lead to ulcer and when there is ulcer it again leads to constipation (since we hesitate to take enough fluids, I think).So, make sure that you have a clean stomach during the ulcer period. For me, it also helps reduce the pain.

In my case, since I wasn't the person who cooks, or had a say on it , there wasn't any control over it. Many a times there weren't any choice (don't ask me why). So, avoid spicy food and acidic fruits. In some pple, taking milk helps (not for me), eat lots of greens (try avoiding papaya, and tomato, if you are regular with it), I use the Smyle mouth ulcer gel. At night, clean the ulcer and wash your mouth with any antiseptic mouth wash ( I use Listerine ). Washing with aspirin also helps, but better use some antiseptic. Though we won't feel like drinking water, drink lots of water. Never take any pepsi/coke stuff. Acidic food is best avoided during these period but somebody told me (when I was in a medical chat room, long ago) less diluted lemon juice helps . Never tried it. You can try folic acid tabs (if you go to a doc, then also he/she need to do some trials to find out the cause), if lack of that is the cause, it will fasten the healing process. I have tried that and as of now, I don't remember whether it was useful for me or not. And a veg diet is best for these period (avoid even egg, this was one of my earlier doc's advice)

And finally, there are many medicines available these days (including some injections which can heal the ulcer within 72 hours – but don't use). Since you are working and this ulcer and pain can even affect your mood, you can even consult a doc, if the pain is very severe.

Rgds

Friendly Religion!

Yesterday I was sitting in a ‘happinessless’ mood. But I wasn’t sad. May be I missed somebody. That won’t make you sad coz it’s a different feeling. Then came a call from a friend of mine who lives in a different place (abt 1000 km away). We know each other since 24 years and I became a lil happy that he called me up. It was very odd time and hence I thought something might be wrong. But he said he is in a train and it’s yet to move and thought he just call me. Thanks you pal.

Day before yesterday, another friend called me up from one icy and frosty place (he is a soldier) to update me on certain things. We are friends since 32 years.

So it was a mixture of things - whether getting updated or losing the updates and getting missed, but it had something in common – friends

What is special about today? I did not see anything particularly special. Many cells in my body might have died and new one might have born. I became one more day older and I am one more day closer to death.

But today I once again thought about friends.

How long a friendship lasts?

One of my friends, who also is a blogger, observes that friends move together and then part. And she says the maturity is not getting panic when our friend(s) moves away from us. She even compares friendship with plants – it can die…..period of intimacy, withdrawal, distance… she gives many such nice observations.

Why am I telling this? I saw a friendship happening and dying on the same day. The ‘friendship’ lasted only a few minutes, may be….. I don’t know the exact reason why it died but religion can be one of the reasons.

May be for some people even religion matters in a friendship. Most of my friends are followers of this person’s religion. This was the first experience of this kind. I believe friendship is beyond religion. Religion is something personal. And believing that God is partial to a particular religious sect is absolute nonsense.

I used to spend the whole day in a church with a Christian friend of mine during Good Friday service. Nothing happened to me or my/his religion. I had food from the church and it did not create any indigestion but it was more enjoyable since I was having it with my friend.

Christmas is on its way and how I wish I could spend that with a (particular) Christian friend of mine, this year.

I was talking about my day…. Yes, by 4 O’clock in the evening, I was expecting my son back from school. He used to come between 3.55 and 4. It became 4.05…4.10….4.15… then I started getting worried. I called up his friend who used to come in the same bus. Nobody picked up the phone. I called another friend of his and her parent said she reached home in time. Then I called up his school. Nobody picked the phone. Then I called my wife and informed about the situation. She tried her level best to contact whoever she knows like the parent of one of his (son’s) friends, the in-charge of the school bus, school…. And she became a lil panic. I could make out the shiver in her voice (she was in a bus on her way home from office)…….. Son reached home one hour late due to some unexpected problems with school bus schedule

In such situations we are prone to think ‘bad’ possibilities. I did not become panic, but I became too silly for a moment and thought of sending one txt to one of my friends and ask to pray (who lives thousands of miles away and believes in a different religion!!)….

My thought might have been silly, but what I believe is there are friends who stand with us when we are in need of them, irrespective of what religion both believes in.

The Truth !

Hmmm, OK, let it be a story this time


Once there were some truth seekers. They were very regular in attending all the ceremonies and related things that happened in heir place of worship. One day they were coming after attending such an activity. They saw one old lady searching for something outside her house. So, they asked her:

“What are you looking for?”

“I lost my needle” , replied the old lady

They joined in the search and finally found nothing.

“The needle is not here, where did you lose it” , one of them asked.

“I lost it inside my house” said old lady

“Then you should look inside your house and not outside” said another.

“It is dark inside, so I am searching outside”

They all laughed at her loudly.

“Children, you are also doing the same thing, what you are searching is not outside, you too need to look inside” replied the old women.



So?

Let Me Praise

You had told me that
The journey won’t be effortless
You had told me that
I should not give up
You had told me that
You will be there with me, always

I thought you left me
I thought you gave up

I got engrossed by the wonderful garden
You said we still have long way to go
I waked here I walked there
And I thought I lost you, you left me

I got fascinated by the mountains
The dew and oceans
I wandered here I wandered there
And I thought I lost you, you left me

When I was about to fall
You held me up
When I was to got washed away
You took me on your shoulder




How can you be this patient?
How can you be this loving?

When I realized it was me
Who walked away
Who left you ; I felt guilty
But you patted me on my back

When I realized
You were always waiting for me
Patiently ; I felt guilty
You smiled at me with glory

Thank you for always being there
Thank you for keeping the promise
Thank you for always waiting for me
Let me praise your name again

Sexy Migraine!

Well, first of all, thanks Michael for the comment. I was in a fix on where to start from… Should I explain the male sex process or not…. Should I explain the common myths in this connection or not….should I explain the major difference between male and female orgasm, ejaculation or not…..etc etc ….. Am still in the fix.

Please understand that most of the men around us wont even accept the fact that there is fatigue in connection with sex, where as it’s a reality we both know being men. Please remember that I used the word ‘too much sex’. And I had a reason.

Most of the information you might get in connection with this subject might be western thoughts. But East had clear idea on this subject than the west and hence we have the Tantric and Taoistic thoughts (out of scope of migraine). So understand that male sex involves lots (loss) of Vital Energy also.( And there are ways to improve the energy levels too).

(West is gifted with science and East with religion and spirituality.. All we need to do is respect each other’s knowledge and thus it complements. Creator sees this place as a single thing and not as many continents or countries. Its all our ego that limits)

My answer, for the time being, is : please understand that neurotransmitters, including Serotonin, are heavily involved in sex.

Most of male are ignorant about the scientific understanding of his genitals and its function. The very best example is people believing both orgasm and ejaculation are just the same, in case of a male. So, if one say that one felt tired after sex, one might even get an answer that its just psychological. Semen is not just a liquid carrying some sperms. It contains so many other things (like citric acid, amino acids, fructose, enzymes, phosphorylcholine, prostaglandin, potassium, zinc, water, calcium, chlorine, magnesium, vitamin B12…… etc etc etc )Through the sperms, part of ‘you’ goes. Don’t forget that it is part of another ‘creation’ process which needs energy.

I remember one incident. When I consulted a doc (for my headache), and when he came to know that I was a bachelor that time, he suggested me to get married. But I asked him, why he suggested that since from a physiological/biological point of view, we don’t need a women to fulfill our sexual urge. Then he answered me that he did not mean the ‘only sex’ part, but I might get a companion and thus I can unload some of my stress by talking to her, discussing with her etc. (well, it can swing the other way also, but lets be optimistic)

So, that is one reason for this belief. Somebody might have suggested a marriage and he might have something in his mind. For many people, when they hear ‘get married’ first thing that comes into their mind is sex. Where as that is not the case.

By telling this, please understand that I did not tell normal sex will cause migraine. I did not try to explain the sex process. I just tell you that neurotransmitters plays a role in both cases and that is one of the the logics behind it.

Easy way to practically experience this logic is having sex/ejaculating when there is migraine and see the effect.

If you have any specific doubt regarding this/want more clarification on what I wrote, please feel free to mail me and I will be happy to give you a personal reply.

Migraine

I don’t remember exactly when I developed my first headache; it started during childhood. But I was about 25 when my headache officially got confirmed by a Neurologist as Migraine.

I used to read a lot of science including medical stuffs/headache related and hence I knew that it was migraine. But I never consulted a doc for treating my headache till I visited that Neurologist. After that I did see some. During childhood, nobody cared to take me to a doc when I had headache.

So, what is migraine? It is the most popular headache in this world. The rich, poor, doctors, teachers, students, musicians, athletes, …..all types of people from all over the world are put up with it. About 30 million people in the U.S suffer from it (no idea whether such a statistics available for my country) with women being affected three times more than men.

I read somewhere it is a neurological disease. And don’t agree to that. It is not a disease but a defect. There are lots of theories behind it but no one knows what exactly is the cause and cure, since there are so many causes and so far no cure available.

But it is good that day by day new and new research is happening and we get some results. If the research is carried out by some pharmaceutical company, they come out with some new drug….If it is sponsored by some other body, the result might show the color of that body. And if it is carried out by some genuine body out of humanitarian grounds, well, it might come out with some facts behind it.

My mom was the first migraineur I happened to see. I spent a lot of time in my life trying to observe, study, and understand this headache….not from a medical point of view. I had taken Allopathic and Homoeopathic medicines.

Some doctors gave me false assurance that migraine can be cured and thus I took lots of medicine for it. Under that neurologist, I took so many drugs for about six months continuously and then it went up to one year. And finally I realized that I wasted all that money and time. But during that treatment period, there weren’t much migraine attacks since my doc’s approach was preventing migraine.

What is migraine again?

Migraine is classified under vascular headache. And it has a lot to do with the dilation and constriction of blood vessels in our head. When these vessels enlarges (usually till to a point where it can not stretch any longer) beyond normality, we get migraine.

Migraine can be broadly classified into two, viz,

Migraine with Aura : Sufferers gets a visual indication like blurred/double vision, golden flies etc before an episode.

Migraine without Aura : Most common. No visual indication. I belong to this group

There are some other variations of migraine. But I don’t know anybody suffering from that (I personally know at least 7 people with migraine). Though I have read about Basilar Type Migraine which can even be fatal, never heard about somebody died of migraine.

Migraine is mostly one sided headache, not always. Sometimes it starts from the eyes/temple and spreads back. Migraine gives a pulsating/throbbing headache and nausea. Gets aggravated by physical movement/activity, light (especially florescent) and sound – photophobia and phonophobia. Some times we might feel vertigo. I prefer to crash out in a dark room. Sometimes sitting position gives a better feeling than lying down. May be coz of less flow of blood to head. In general migraine has a family history/hereditary.

What causes all this? Why all people are not facing this problem? Why only some?

It is due to chemical imbalance in our brain/body.

There are some chemicals in our body that help communication between nerves. These chemicals are known as Neurotransmitters. It is said that, the imbalance of neurotransmitters is the cause of migraine.

I read somewhere that in some people, the number of neurotransmitter receptors is more and hence it creates another type of imbalance in such people which is the cause for migraine in them.

The most important neurotransmitters of the Central Nervous System (CNS) in connection with migraine are Serotonin and Norepinephrine. These chemicals have a role in controlling the size of the blood vessels, apart from other functions.

So, migraineurs need more of these chemicals. For that the best option is eating well than popping a pill. That is why at least some doctors think in this direction at least in the U.S. and west. Some even came out with patented nutritional supplements for this purpose. I think it won’t become popular till some pharma giant starts producing it.

If it is these neurotransmitters that cause all these problems, why some get migraine when they eat particular food?

There are lots of things which can cause a chemical imbalance in our body. Number one is food allergy. Then toxic waste within our body, internal inflammation, poor absorption of nutrients, poor metabolism, food/chemicals that can deplete the level of these neurotransmitters etc etc…..

So, a bad/not so healthy stomach is one of the reasons, stress is another big reason which produces stress hormones and there by causing an imbalance. Physical exertion including too much sex (in male), mental exertion and stress, and lots of similar stuffs can cause a chemical imbalance.

Hormonal change during menstrual period is another reason for migraine in females.

We need to provide enough nutrients so that brain can produce enough of these chemicals, by eating properly and wisely. This means avoiding those foods which can trigger a migraine and including those foods which can help in the production of these chemicals.


Main Trigger Factors

Food allergy and sensitivity towards certain food and chemicals
Dehydration
Irregular eating time/ missing a meal
Change in sleep-wake cycle
Too much sleep and lack of sleep
Loud sound
Too much exposure to sun
Inhalation of some chemicals and smells (like paint), which are serotonin depleting and vaso-constrictive.
Bowl problems
Hormone change
Cold or Sinusitis
Change in blood sugar level
Malnutrition (especially magnesium deficiency)
Change in atmospheric pressure / stormy weather condition
Anxiety/stress/physical excretion/too much sex

Prevention

Avoid food that already gave you enough migraine (need to observe – keep a food diary)
Eat balanced food with enough nutrients/ take supplement
Exercise regularly but moderately
Practice yoga/meditation or some breathing technique to control stress (and there by stress hormones). - I have personally benefited by this
It is said that cold water shower/head bath helps (not when there is a headache, but otherwise)

There are lots of drugs available. That is beyond the scope of this blog.

Food to avoid

Have an eye on what you eat. If you noticed that a particular food gave you migraine many times, avoid it. Or better note down the food you suspect and talk to your doc.

Here are some proven trigger foods, in many people.

Red Wine
Monosodium Glutamate or MSG
Cheese
Chocolate
Nuts – especially peanut
Over ripened fruits
Tobacco
Fermented food
Alcoholic drinks (beer included)
Very strong coffee

There is a very loooooooooooooooooong list that can scare and we might think ‘ oh, then what will I eat?’ . No need to panic. Just avoid the ones that already gave migraine, coz, most of the time, it depends on person to person.

Eating a few peanuts never gives me a migraine, for example. And eating lot if it gave migraine many times. Sometimes food had indirect effect. That is, we might get indigestion, the food waste gets fermented and thus releases toxins.


Food to include

An Apple keeps ……. Yes, fresh apple is good for you, including pineapple
A couple of almonds per day
Banana, carrot
Beef, Pork, Chicken, lamb, liver – eat fresh
Watermelon, cucumber
Oats, dates, barley, corn
Milk - if you are not allergic
Pears, sweet potato, spinach
Broccoli and cabbage, Lettuce
Brown rice
Fresh lobster and mackerel

This also is a long list.

There are some food supplement available in many countries like U.S. (not in India) which are targeted for migraineurs. It mainly contains:

Vit-C, Niacin, Vit-B6, Magnesium, Folic Acid, Calcium, Copper and some ‘proprietary blend’

My personal experience

When I was under migraine specific drugs like ergotamine, things became worst after every attack. Migraine became more and more strong. And my present doc straightaway asked me to stop that, who understands migraine well because he too used to get it.

What helped me to control my migraine is regular exercise, drinking adequate water, avoiding some specific trigger foods, and then a wonderful breathing technique called ‘Sudarshan Kriya’.

If I break rules, sometimes I get a migraine. But now, things are under better control.

Conclusion

Migraine is a vascular headache, meaning, a headache caused by the enlargement of blood vessels in our head. This happens because of the imbalance of neurotransmitters like Serotonin and Norepinephrine.

And finally the disclaimer part, I just shared some of my experience, thoughts and what I read about migraine. This is not an authentic/medical article on migraine.

It is always better to consult your doc than treating all by yourself !!!

OldMan and the Moon

October -11-2007

Oldman did not sleep well yesterday night. So he was very tired the whole day. He looked at his wish list for that day. He was having a strange wish list. He did not know when the items in the list will change. He read the first two things from the list

Hummer – 2 nos
Air ticket to Greece – 4 to 5
…
…
…

He checked his wallet and bank accounts and sighed. Then he kept his head ahead and smiled. He remembered a Gospel “ Nothing is impossible for God”.

Then he went to gym. He thought he need to keep fit to take delivery of a sports utility vehicle. He wore a tight T-shirt and entered the gym. There were many young guys. They looked at his fit looking body. Old man did not know whether they drooled or not. But he told them:

“Sons, if you want to keep young, be young at heart. For that you need the company of young people. Not just young but young and active people, who can dance sing, jump, climb artificial wall, play badminton, swim, moon gaze….”

“What? Moon gaze? You mean star gaze?” asked one of them

“Yes son, its moon gazing… moon gazing is very good for keeping young. Moon is astrologically connected to our mind and those who are connected to moon are dreamers.. Dreamers can at least dream that they are young even when they are getting older…gotcha?”

“But we already are young…” another one

“Then you grow old and get the company of young ones….pssssst, son, don’t tell this to anybody”

“Thanks” they all replied.

Oldman finished his workout and he felt really good. He went out and walked a little….some thoughts flashed in his mind and he became happy.

He thanked God and then he thanked his friends and he said to himself “This is not the time to think about death……Good Night”

The night became good!!! There came lots of stars in the sky...and the moon too!!!

Open Sesame !!

Q: Which is the most difficult thing to open?

A: Closed minds and hearts.

Right Time!

It is said that there is no wrong time for doing a right thing. If one feels like doing a right (right and wrong are relative, I know, I use the word ‘right’ in a generally/socially/rationally accepted way) thing, just do it now. If one thinks over it again and again, who knows what will happen?

There is a good example/story in Mahabharata.

Karna is known for his generosity. One day, while he was taking bath, a man from a priestly family asked for alms. He was holding a vessel in his left hand (since he was a king, it must be expensive) and he gave that to the man.

In India, one is not supposed to do that with his left hand, that too a King. The man got surprised and asked why he did that. Then Karna said :

“By the time I bring it to my right hand, what if I lose the intention of giving?”

The End….

Dr.Jay's Successful Disappointment !

What do I wanted to become in my life? Yes, my profession…

Forget about childhood days. If there is nobody to guide and we are not exceptional, there might come so many options, as a child…

In this regard, here, in India, we need to have an idea once we clear the 10th grade. And according that one need to choose ones 11th grade then take the entrance exams for higher studies etc.

I wasn’t an outstanding student, though I came within the first 2-3-4 ranks in my class. That just happened because other students weren’t good at studies (There was class strength of 40-50 students). But I was a ‘first class’ student from first grade.

One of my uncles (my dad’s eldest brother) wished to ‘make’ his children (three) a doctor. He had enough money to support the studies. But his daughters did not study well. Since I was the one who successfully came out with first class from the start, he was interested in me. And science was my favorite subject. Sometimes I even scored a 90% in science, not always. This I achieved without exceptional brains or any support from my family, friends or teachers…

Computer science wasn’t a popular thing that time. I haven’t even seen any computer that time. The most common choices for ‘not-bad-at-studies’ students were, Medicine, Engineering, CA/CPA, and Law

So, after tenth, I decided to build my career as a doctor. That uncle said he has got some plans and hence to proceed with my wish. I too was happy. But I did not get the marks I expected for the final exam conducted by that Board. There was this option for going for a re-valuation. But many people discouraged me and told me that I might lose an academic year and hence continue with my studies and study better next time. But I was very much sure that I did not get the marks I deserved. Usually it was me who used to score better marks than my sister, from first grade till 10th grade final exam, but this time, she got better scores!! (one reason could be my bad handwriting)

But I had enough marks to get which course I wanted. So I did not try in many colleges, just put an application in a college where I wanted to study and waited. Yes, finally I was called and thus happily joined for science. In this course, apart from languages, I need to study, Physics, chemistry, Botany and Zoology (which was then called as the II group). But if anyone wants to try engineering as a career, he needs to take the I group where they study Math instead of our biology.

And we, the II group students had the option to study Math as additional subject (study privately and give the exam), since it does not have any labs. So that they can appear for both medicine and engineering entrance exams. Most of my classmates took Math, not me.

I was too much into college politics that time. And till 10th grade, I studied in Malayalam medium, which was my mother tongue and local language. Here from 11th grade, we need to study everything in English. I did not get a shock to see the big text books printed in English coz of two reasons. One, I liked English and two, I have seen these text books three years ago when my sister studied.

Physics was one of my favorite subjects. But I managed to fail in the first test given by my college (hehehe). I bunked classes and attended political meetings. I got involved into college strikes and protests. I did not attend any classes if the professors did not take attendance. And in many cases, I attended counting the attendance so that I will get a minimum. But I hardly attended any English class (English is one of the subjects where most of the failed ones fail since there is drastic difference between the 10th and 11th grade syllabus). But science teachers came out with a rule that if we don’t attend the theory classes, we won’t be allowed in the labs. So, I attended most of the science classes, usually were boring and useless. This happened that way coz, all these lecturers and professors used to give private tuitions at home and they preferred that than teaching at this government college.

But I started working on my physics (physics syllabus also wasn’t continuation of 10th grade but was tough). And I decided to come out with a first class here too.

My family was going through a financial crisis that time. So, there weren’t any money available for Entrance coaching classes (after 12th we need to take an entrance exam to get admission in medical colleges. And most of the students who really wish to pursue their medical studies started attending the entrance exam coaching classes from the start of 11th grade). That wasn’t a big issue since that uncle was there. I was sure that he might help me when I move to 12th grade or when I clear the exam.

Bad luck. That uncle died all of a sudden. (One night he came back , took his shower, and had dinner did his prayers and sat on a chair. And then he did now wake up).

But there goes my medical dream!!!

He had told me his plan. He will help me in the start. Then he will look for a girl from a rich family and then ‘fix’ my marriage with that rich man’s girl (who must be a dump I think…hehehe) in such a way that they will sponsor my studies and once I am of age, I should marry that girl. WOW ! what a brain!. I wasn’t interested in this, but I was sure that he will help me out, someway.

Now I lost all my hope. I did not put any extra effort. I cleared 12th grade and I had enough marks to take the Entrance exam. But that time, our family’s financial condition was such that at the end or the month, there weren’t even a 10 bucks currency in my dad’s wallet. And to add a colorful feather to the hat, I developed some strange eye allergy. Eyes became red and I felt like there is sand inside it. It itched and became watery. Two or three eye docs failed to cure it and it even affected my studies. (Finally, a retired professor doc cured it)

I was very disappointed. De-motivated. Frustrated. I could take the entrance exam next year also, if I wanted. Or even after three years, after finishing my graduation in science (taking either physics, chemistry, botany or zoology as main).

Since I did not see much things happening, I decided to quit science itself. Studying commerce/accounting was the next option to get a job as an accountant etc. And thus for graduation I took commerce as my subject with Accountancy as main. I studied it privately without joining any college. Means, Enroll for the course, just study in whatever way I want, pay the exam fee and take the university exam with other college students.

But I kept on reading science. I took science magazines and books from library. And whenever I visited hospitals (to see somebody), I used to sigh and I got a sort of feeling.

I was not at all interested in these commerce ‘stuffs’. Accountancy looked ‘stupid’ at the start. And the main problem I faced here is, the degree level was the continuation of those commerce and accountancy of the 11th and 12th grade and I never had any idea about what even debit and credit was.

Then I went for tuition for the very basic things and that tutor was hopeless. Since that guy was known to me, I attended the classes as some obligation and I paid fee. (Yes, one need learn to say NO when it is needed). This went for some months and then I stopped his ‘accounting basic’ class, by just stop going. He might have waited for me for many days.

Failed in accountancy in the first year! I wasn’t used to failures. Disappointment again, then regrets for taking this stream for my graduation.

I started giving tuitions for school children to earn my own pocket money. Another reason was, my dad bought me a moped (small scooter like thing) and I put forward a condition that he doesn’t have to give me money for the fuel. (That time, my parents retired from jobs and thus we had enough money (since they were in government service, they had gratuity, provident fund, pension etc).

But the worst thing was politics and social work. It was like a fulltime work. Most of the time I was out doing this and that and I hardly studied anything. Rest of the time I laid up with migraine.

Then during second year, my dad passed away. Thus my responsibility-being the only male member of the family- increased. But his death created some unwanted issues. The death certificate came with wrong spelling. Then it became a mess. Then to get the insurance money, it was another fight. Thus solving those things became my main job during second year. And it took months. But I cleared the exams. During some of the exams, I was suffering from migraine.

During my graduation years, lots of BIG political and social event happened where I was involved. It really took a toll on my studies.

Finally, the final exam came. And I wasn’t prepared at all. I thought I will give the exams next year.

But the problem with me is I like writing exams and writing an exam would give us some practical experience. So I took all the exams and waited for a ‘fail’.

Unfortunately I cleared all the exams, but with indecent marks!!! (Except for accountancy where I got a first class). That was one of the moments in my life- may be the only one- where a success gave me disappointment. So, I thought I will make up all these things when I do my Post Graduation.

Did I? That’s another story…..

If any youngster is reading this, my advice is not to follow my path. Have a dream and work for it. Don’t worry, it will come true…..I will pray for you!!

Love and Sixth Sense !

Love is a positive emotion. But the strange thing with love is it makes you weak!! Don’t take it literally but think it over….It can cause longing and longing can cause sort of pain. And this pain is something different! Sometimes at least for some people, it’s a pleasant and sweet pain.

Anyway, having a loving environment in your house generates a positive energy in your house. If you visit a house where most of the time it is quarrel what is happening, you get a negative ‘feel’….. a sort of unhappy feeling…some discomfort…... So, if the humans who live there can’t generate the emotion ‘love’ towards each other, or when somebody step into his or her own house and then loses that emotion (thinking, “don’t know what cud be the menu for today’s fight”!!!), what can be done?

There come pets. We can have pets and love them. Thus we can bring the emotion love into our home.

True love creates an emotional attachment. Sometimes one can even feel the loved one… read their mind….. This not only applies to humans but with pets also. I would share an incident.

One of my cousins had a cat as pet. She was a spinster till she died. She really loved that cat and vice versa. I have personally seen some dramatic scenes. One day the cat comes from outside, she spreads her hands and the cat jumps into her hands. Then she asks “where did you go? What happened?” …etc and cat answers her with a “ Meaow”….

One major difference between a cat and a dog is, a cat connects itself to the house and its environment and not to the humans living there. So, if you ask a cat to follow you, outside the house, it hardly follows. I am not talking about cats that live in closed environments like apartments. We used to live in independent houses where we had land and the cat goes outside as and when it wants to go. It was always free.

Cousin had to shift the house. So, when they actually locked up the house the cat was out and they could not find him (was a boy).

My cousin became very sad (she was living with her brother’s family and when brother moved, there weren’t any choice and other family members weren’t ready to wait for the cat to come!!!). The new place was about 4 kilometers (abt 2.5 miles) away from her old place, and they started living there. My cousin missed this cat very badly and it even affected her health and she started losing her weight.

Weeks later, one day she heard a “Meaow’ and there comes her cat……it traveled all this distance to find his master…no need to say how happy she became! And then she recovered even without medicine!!!

(I asked the cat “ Man, how did you do this? Then the cat answered “ Psssssst, its sixth sense..”, with a wink!)

OMG !

The other day I happened to hear a movie dialog :

“ …this is not the right time for a fight, you pray to Gods …..”

So, how many Gods are there in this universe?

Number-wise I don’t know, but there are two types of Gods.

First – Who is the reason for all these creation, omnipotent and omnipresent. Without this force knowing not even a microbe moves. Whose presence is there everywhere and in everything. Humans are also created by this force. Very loving….. Not at all popular.

Second – Man made. They are present in places of worship. They have particular religion which again created by man. They are partial to their followers. Followers can enjoy heaven and others will be cursed and sent to hell. Cause for many fights, riots and terror ………….. VERY POPULAR!

Booooooo....I possess !!!

If somebody is possessive about friends, what should he (or she ...I am using 'he' for convenience) do? If you had a bad experience with a friendship, what do you do? Have more friends or run away from further friendships?

Where do I stand? Am I the right person to assess myself?

Well, looking at oneself is always good, which many of us don’t do. If we don’t know what we are, then things will get more complicated.

I am not a typical possessive person who can’t be reasoned, who hesitates to share and very jealous. I did not face any such problem when I was a child or a teenager (it starts at childhood and troubles more at teenage). I also understand that it is not completely up to me to decide whether I am possessive or not.

But in friendship, in my life, some friends became closer to me. Means, I considered them closer to me (not the other way). It doesn’t mean that they did not like me and I was after them. For them, may be it’s just a friendship and for me I liked them a little more.

In such friendships, when a “quarrel like” thing happens or a breakage happens, a person like me gets more hurt (if a friendship is not built on trust, there are more possibilities for such situations).

So based on that experience, my opinion is, it is always better to have more friends. When one fully depends on a particular friend to meet all his needs, he is in trouble. It is always better to discuss many topics with different friends than talking everything with a particular friend (if both are in sync, there is nothing wrong in doing so, but here the issue is a 40-60 or 30-70 or 20-80 friendship).

The advantage of having many friends is that different persons might have different likes (and dislikes) so we can share many things with many friends. If one of them leaves you (due to work, marriage etc) you won’t get completely drained.

So if somebody had some issues with one friend and got really hurt, that doesn’t mean that he/she should avoid making new friends. It doesn’t mean that he should avoid people. And in many cases, friendship just happens.

Just because all humans are nature’s product, are we all same? (not talking at spiritual or theological level). No is my answer. Many of us might have an experience of feeling uncomfortable when we see some people, when some people stand with us in the lift (especially when our aura’s overlap)……people are different and some people are not much emotionally attached with their friends, its their birth nature. In the same way we feel some people as special. Some people fall in love at first sight……. Since friends are also humans (here in this context), this applies in friendships also; for some, some people are not just another human.

When I was hospitalized long ago, mostly it was my friends who stayed with me and not my relatives. I sat as a by-stander for one of my cousins whenever he underwent his eye operation (many times) why because we were more friends than relatives.

There is one writer, Anais Nin, who talked about friends in a beautiful way:

“Each friend represents a world in us, a world not born until they arrive, and it is only by this meeting that a new world is born.”