Organic Thoughts and a GPS

I happen to have some mail conversations and chats with some of my friends regarding my hometown, global warming, organic food, GPS ,maps etc. and this made me think about my own life style change.

The other day I was travelling using the GPS application in my phone. I had to stop for lunch but I forgot to turn the GPS off. I went to the rest room first and as soon as I entered the rest room, the GPS said ‘Turn left….’ and that was kind of embarrassing. I wasn’t using GPS to find where exactly the urinal is but it sounded like that.

These days we use GPS system to find almost every place- like to find a place of worship, post office, rest area, hotel, beach, pizzeria, gas station, mall,…There was no GPS during my childhood and I have not seen anybody using any kind of maps either, to travel. Till I came to US I had not used even a road map to move around (but yes, I had collected some route directions from those who have already been to those places). When we send a search request to find an ATM near us, we don’t even realize that we are sending signals to 4 or more satellites which are thousands of miles away. I have experience of losing way even while travelling with the help of a GPS. This made me wonder about world travellers like Monk Hsuan Tsang who successfully travelled from China to India over a thousand years ago…The three wise men (probably astrologers) travelled hundreds of miles to see Jesus, 2000 years ago…Later, Jesus Christ travelled all the way to India without GPS…amazing.

(They all took help from the sun, moon , stars and the earth’s magnetic field, I know.. but still it is amazing)

Had to tell one of my friends how my native city was some 40 years ago. The tap water was potable and we never even heard of water filter or any such purifying system. Water from the wells tasted great and it never gave any diarrhea, though it was natural home for many insects. Bottled water did not even exist in my place, that time. The air was cleaner and I don’t know whether ‘pure oxygen’ was sold in pharmacy stores like they do these days.

Couple of times, I heard President Obama speaking of the importance of investing in cleaner energy sources. I do not know whether this talk was because of the pressure to stop the oil wars. We had used firewood based ovens for cooking (from firewood to kerosene was a big upgrade that time). Was that a prehistoric way of cooking? Then how come traditional BBQ is still modern and civilized?

‘Don’t forget to switch off the lights during earth hour”…..

We never had any special hour for earth during my childhood, though we loved mother earth. Our tradition taught us to consider earth as a goddess as well as our mother. I happen to see that some of the pathway lights here are on 24/7. And it was surprising for me to see that many corporates here keep hundreds of lights on even during weekends/holidays (when nobody is working). We had very little electrical equipment during my childhood. That table fan of ours was a luxury and we mainly used it when we had guests. It looks like my dad never used an electric iron in his entire life. He ironed his cloths using a traditional coal based iron box till his last days.

We used to grind kitchen stuffs manually – like rice, green gram, black gram etc. We made dough and batter using our hands (with the help of grinding stones etc …there are some other traditional stuffs but I don’t know its name in English) and not with any blender or mixer. We kids ran to grocery stores making vroooom sound assuming that we are driving a car or a motor bike. We walked to school and used bus or taxi only when we had to travel more than 2 miles (or so, or when there is an urgency/emergency). During my childhood I never even thought of machines that could wash and dry cloths. We washed our cloths and dishes with our hands (this I did till I came to US. Here in US, there is no washing soap – we can find it in Asian stores). There weren’t any obese kids in our school (except some from rich families). And hence there weren’t any juvenile diabetes caused by obesity. Kids, parents and even grandparents, everybody did some natural ‘exercise’ every day as part of our day to day activity.. When I was 6 years old, I was able to and used to walk to school which was 3 miles away… Gyms were only for those who are very serious about body building and they were hard to find..

By the way, will switching off lights for one hour save this planet? I asked couple of people in what way this helps prevent global warming and I did not get any proper answer. Yes, it is symbolic and may be it has some chain/cascading effects too but many a times for some people and organizations it is just a fad. Somebody said ‘the heat from the bulb…’ Well, if that is the case, look at this – here in US, most of the cars turn on headlights even during day time. This means a million headlights turned on during day time, very single day (personally I found this useful while driving in freeways) which definitely can increase the atmospheric temperature.

Carbon dioxide is considered (by many ‘scientific people’ and organizations) as the main greenhouse gas. After seeing the US lifestyle, I asked myself this question – where does the carbon dioxide from the carbonated drinks go? Why this aspect is not at all considered as an environmental issue? Here people empty tons of gallons of soda and beer every day. There is no US without soda and beer. It is the same with many European countries. At this point, we need to look into one thing – how many global warming research organizations got funds from soda companies?

Why is China (and India) ALWAYS blamed for CO2 related issues? Even the USA flags we get here in US stores are made in China ! Go to any store here and we find less than 5% ‘Made in USA’ items. Out of that 95%, 80-90% is Chinese products. This means China has lots of industries and factories. US is a capitalist nation and they never want to help a communist country (the Vietnam War is a proof). So?

So, it is clear that this happened so because of corporate vested interest to boost profits by utilizing China’s cheap labor, infrastructure cost and other production costs and not- so- strong environmental laws. If industries in China are polluting the environment, it is for and because of the corporates and MNCs from the west (And this policy is one of the major reasons for the current recession in US). If I have a factory in another country that is polluting the environment, whom should I blame, myself or that country and its people?

So, CO2 is a big problem? Look at the creation. The creator created both plants and animals. Animals breathe in oxygen and breathe out CO2. Plants take CO2 and gives out oxygen…awesome. That means, if we are facing issues related to excess CO2, it also means we need more natural plants and trees (not plastic ones).

Plastic wasn’t a big player during my childhood. I never had a plastic lunch box. We had more of stainless steel, aluminum and copper utensils. We had aluminum ‘school bags’ (box shaped)and metallic pencil boxes.

How did we buy milk, 40 years ago? Some families had cows at home. They used to sell excess milk and we go to their house with some stainless steel utensil. Or, milkmen used to come to our place and he pours milk into what utensil we hand him over to, which usually were stainless steel or aluminum. Then it became glass bottles. These glass bottles were re-usable. Same was the case with soft drinks. There was coke and Fanta during my childhood too but they all were in glass bottles and not in plastic bottles. We used to carry cloth bags to market or grocery stores. Veggies were directly put into those bags and grocery items were packed in paper bags. We hardly used any insecticides and chemical fertilizers. I myself had a small kitchen garden where I had a kind of pea, tomato, green chili, eggplant, ladies finger, yam, plantain/banana etc (and rose, jasmine, shoe flower etc ).

So, 40 years back, I was eating organic food almost every day? I did not know how lucky I were during that time. After all these years of scientific developments and new food pyramids, now we are asked to stay away from genetically modified foods and grab organic ones ….

Years passed and passed....And now? Limiting the use of electric and electronic equipments, daily walking and exercise, organic food, eating more fruits and veggies, going organic, avoiding plastic, car pooling, cotton shirts, handmade soaps and other goods, herbal, natural and alternative medicine, Yoga... what the..?

It is nothing but going back to the roots but at a cost with a strange price tag.

The 8th Grade

(Written on Jan-31-2010)

I happened to check my own blog. There are less posts these days. For a moment I felt happy about it coz there passed many blogs through my mind during every sleepless nights, which were in plenty, and had I wrote them the next day, it could have resulted in kind of criticism type blogs about a BIG country in which I live now; not all of the blogs but many of them. But lack of sleep has this ability to wipe off those blogs from my mind rather quickly. If we do not get enough sleep, our brain will not function properly. There will be confusion, short term memory loss, fatigue, acidity and GERD (GastroEsophageal Reflex Disease) and so on…some latest studies say that prolonged insomniac nights could result in early death. Whatever…

I think that is a nice introduction for this blog coz it has nothing to do with what I am going to write. Sitting on this couch with slight back pain, upset stomach, tired eyes, mild headache, and aching toes I was thinking about my 8th grade. It took some time to get a visual of my class room. Once it came into my mind, I wondered why it took so long to remember it coz I do remember that class room.

When I joined this school as a 5th grade student, our division, the ‘I’ division, had no particular class room. We were split into many groups and were accommodated into other divisions. I had no idea why they just accommodate and did not absorb. But 8th grade ended this slavery and we got freedom. A separate division got created and we the ‘I’ division became ‘F’ division. May be 8th I division was English medium, I don’t remember now. We had both English and Malayalam medium divisions in our school and I was in the Malayalam medium. English medium was considered as something ‘above’ Malayalam medium. English medium had no representation from poor people (this does not mean that Malayalam medium was filled only with poor people). I think there wasn’t any extra fee for English medium or was there?

Who was my class teacher? Can’t remember.. it was either John Sir or Titus Sir. I still remember some of my 8th grade teachers, obviously by their nick name. Geography teacher was known as ‘Ambattan’ which means barber and Malayalam teacher was known as ‘Eruma’ which means buffalo. English teacher’s name can’t be written here coz it means something dirty (once I got a very niiiiice pinch from him for trying to imitate his signature).

None of us in that class can forget our Math teacher, Titus. He got transferred to this school that year and ours was his first class he taught. He was a terror. He always carried a cane. He beaten up the students and very soon there came some uproar against him. There came writings and graffiti against him on many walls on the school. Our school was well known for politics (major political parties have their student wings. Our class and school elections were just like president and prime minister Elections of the country. All contestants belonged to one or another political party ) and thus there were kind of rowdy students too in our school. I think Titus became a discussion among them and some of them even called him names, hiding here and there. (Later on, Titus sir left the school and joined a College as a Math lecturer. This wasn't coz of the anti-Titus movement but he always wanted to become a College teacher than a school teacher.)

Our new class room was already occupied by a boy who failed two times in a row (such students have to pay a fee for their next term). Happened to meet my 2nd grade best friend. There were only three students in my class who scored first class in 7th grade and promoted to 8th grade and I was one among them. There wasn’t any competition in my class. If Math wasn’t there as a subject, I would have been the topper all the time in that class, coz the other two always scored more marks than me in Math.

One thing about this school is that, once you pass out from here, you will have a clear idea about almost every filthy word in our mother tongue. This is coz every class had some kids who use abusive words liberally and once there was one ‘filthy word competition’ in our class, when there was no teacher for a period. The class divided into two groups for this purpose and each side had one lead person to shout the swear word and the rest hauled, whistled and made noise tapping on the desk. All of a sudden a teacher appeared and asked who did that (shouting dirty words). Though couple of students including me were against that ‘competition’, we did not name others coz it would have made our lives tough in that school. Some students managed to bring some porn book in the class and they always kept we, the so-called decent guys, at a par and we were warned to not to tell this to the teacher.

The English teacher assigned the work of checking the homework to three (or four?) students and I was one among them. We were selected based on the marks we scored for the first term examination. My old buddy was supposed to show his book to me and he took advantage of my friendship and many a times came without doing the home work. He never took me seriously. Once or twice I gave my book and asked him to blindly copy it into his book.

(went to bed early coz of headache)
(Feb- 1- 2010)

I started wearing full pants from 8th grade. There were only very few students who were still wearing shorts. That boy who failed twice and studying for the third time was wearing shorts (we had uniform. Black pants –half or full- and white shirt. And, on Wednesday we were allowed to wear color). He was a big boy and the reason seemed that he is poor and half pants cost less compared to full one. But he too started wearing full pants, later on; may be its coz he felt embarrassment since only 2-3 boys were wearing half pants and they were small (short) too.

I got befriended with couple of more boys. I was choosy as far as friendships were concerned. None of my friends used any filthy words while speaking to me. There was a gap between those students who do not study well and those who study well. I wasn’t a very studious boy, though I stood 2nd or 3rd in my class. I was attentive at class and used to do the home work. Other than that, I never had this habit of studying each day. If there was no home work, I didn’t study anything. There were moments where I came without finishing home work and then copying it from one of my friends (this boy (usually) never allowed others to copy from him. He stood first or second in the class and he never helped others during exams). I was one among the toppers because our class mostly had boys who do not study well. There wasn’t much competition and hence I never put an extra effort to improve myself.

I started participating in some Hindi language exams (every year till 10th…I passed all those exams with first class and I somehow lost all those certificates when I shifted my city after marriage) and that’s the end of my extracurricular activities. There were some other similar exams but I did not participate. Now I feel very disappointed about that because, I was good at science and I could have attended some science related stuff. Even our class teacher was not interested in sending his top students to any such exams. At home? Who cares about my studies? Mother never cared about what, how or when we study and father felt OK since I always scored a first class (60% or above). It looks like he had no idea about my potentials.

Usually, we used to play something during lunch break. But I don’t remember what I played when I was in 8th grade. But I remember one incident where one of my friends falling into a pit. It was fully covered with long grass and he accidently fell into it. Which was stupid, keeping a pit open in a boys school or playing somewhere which was not meant for playing? Anyway, he was my close friend and I helped him come out of it by pulling his hands. He had pain in his chest, looked like he felt some difficulty to breathe…

We were more active during ‘Sevana Vaaram’. Sevana Vaaram literally means ‘Service Week’. Every year, during/starting October 2nd, which was Mahathma Gandhi’s birthday, we used to celebrate Sevana Varam. That is, there won’t be any class for one week. But we have to come to school. All we had to do was cleaning the school, neighboring roads etc and some helping the poor and needy acts. The school arranged something to eat (steamed tapioca/cassava for example) and drink (usually black tea or coffee). We always enjoyed that week.

There weren’t any change in my home atmosphere, which never wasn’t great. My sister started attending college. The college was very near (just 5 minutes walk from our home). During the initial days she did not like the college and even cried since the medium of instruction was English. That time, I had no idea how it would be when all of a sudden our teachers teaching everything in English. My house owner’s wife, who was an illiterate that time, came to console my sister. Even now I can remember that moment. I can still see it in my mind (?, or whatever. I refer those dream kind of visuals what appear when we think of something).

In our native place we had this educational institutions called ‘Tutorials’ (and ‘Parallel college’ too) which provide tuitions, not for just one subject but for all subjects we learn at school (we had Malayalam I and II, English I and II, Hindi, Math, Drawing, Craft, (P.T.), History and Civics, Geography, Physics, Chemistry and Biology). By default, most of the middle class students (the upper middle class and rich prefer private lessons or one to one tuitions) used to attend one such place and so did I. It wasn’t the best known place for tuitions or teachers (there were such places too) but one which was closer to my home and run by some unemployed guys (who were friends). It was a mixed class and many a times I had butterflies in my stomach when some girls look at me. One of the boys used to wear the cleanest shirts to impress the girls. He was my school mate and if he came home with a dirty shirt (oh yes, we used to make it dirty), he used to wash it and dry it immediately using electric iron and wear it whenever there was evening classes.

There weren’t any boy-girl friendship in my tuition class. Most of the good girls hardly spoke to boys. I faced serious competition from three girls. Many a times I managed to stand with 2 of them in overall marks but never ever bet one girl (her name is Subha). She was very strong at Math. When I recollect those moments now, I realize that I never took any effort to compete with those girls.

Did I have a soft corner for one of those girls?

Eerie Moments

It rained heavily today.

I love rain. I enjoy looking through the windows when it rains. I like to walk in the rain under an umbrella enjoying the cold breeze. I also like to drive when it rains.

Too much of anything is bad. So, too much of rain also can lead to flood and diseases. During my childhood, to the extend possible, I did not miss a chance to get wet in the rain. But I was scared of my father and hence if I had no choice but to appear in front of him, I avoided getting wet.

I started going to school in bicycle from 8th grade. I had a choice, a new bicycle later or dad’s old cycle on the spot. May be I was impatient and opted for the old cycle (well, father did not buy a new one for him, but then on, he started going to office on foot). Our school timing was 9.30 am to 3.30 pm. Dad was with government service and hence he had office till 5 pm. Thus there is a time gap which I made use during rainy seasons. After school, most of us did not wait for the rain to stop; we used to enjoy the rain liberally. During rainy seasons, we used to carry a polythene bag/cover too so that we can protect our books. But sometimes, it used to get wet.

There is a word associated with rain...... Eerie…

Why is that so? As on this day this time, I don’t know. Is it that frightening? Who are the ones that consider rain as eerie? It looks like it was mostly poets and writers and not common man who really faced troubles. But there is an eerie side for rain in my life.

I don’t remember when it was. It was either when I was in third grade or it should be when I was in 4th grade. We were living in a rented house owned by an uncle of mine. It was a tiled house which was very old too. What happens when it rains? During heavy rains, water used come inside, dripping from the top. Sometimes these dripping gains strength and became a flow.

Eerie moments were the night moments, the sleeping time. Sometimes the rain started after us sleeping and there comes water falling on our head! Then we need to keep some vessel/utensil exactly under it and look for a different place to sleep…if water fell there too, look for another place…and was the house that big so that we have enough space and hence choose a nice place and sleep? Unfortunately, it wasn’t.

It really was irritating. It’s not from (just) one place that water used to drip in, but many. So, how was it? Will the parents take care of such things and we just sleep? Nope. Father hardly bothered about it and hence it was mostly me and my mother who were after getting the utensil and yes, sometimes helped by my sister too (I think only if the dripping bothered her).

We weren’t sleeping on cot and bed. There was only one cot and it was occupied by father. Mom, sister and I slept on the floor during those days. We used to use kind of mattress made of grass and then a couple of bed sheets. Some times we came to know of the dripping water only after our sheets and mattress got wet. That were the most disappointing, frustrating and sad moments. Coz, we may not get a dry one to change. Either there weren’t any spare sheets or the spare ones were still to get dried after a wash.

Yes, those were the days rain was really eerie in my life…

Six and Seven

There weren’t much memorable things that happened in the next couple of years or so. I passed 5the grade with first class. Moved on to a new division (previously was in A division) which I don’t remember, for 6th grade. Opposite to my class room was a big tamarind tree. I got some new friends here. But none of them were specially close to me since they had their own set of friends. So, my 5th grade friend remained with me as a close friend. Till that time, among my friends, I was the most studious and hence there weren’t any competition from them.

Most of our teachers came in bicycles. Many high school teachers had scooter. I did not see anybody coming in car.

For seventh grade I was put into C division. Got acquainted with some more kids and my friends remained same, (those who belonged to my original ‘I’ division). But I met one of my old buddies in this class. He was there with me during my second grade. And among the acquainted ones, one became a little more friendly than the rest of the C division kids (we moved on to different class and then met again at college and he finally became a Dentist)

One thing I remember about this seventh grade is a flood.

There was a kind of slum area half a kilo meter away from our school and that got affected during flood. Hence government used our school to temporarily accommodate them. It was like a camp. Thus we got lots of holidays :). But when we were back to school, on the first day, we were asked to wash and clean our class :(

I went to a tuition center that year. And there I met another old buddy. He wasn’t in my class but we studied in the same school when we were in second grade. He became a friend of mine. When I remember him, the first thing that comes in my mind is the smell of fish. He used to take fish daily and most of the time smelled too. His nick name was ‘monkey’

There was some pressure at the end of the exam since we were moving to high school next year. But I did not take any of these pressures seriously, either from school or from the tuition center. Parents did not bother about my studies.

There was a club and community hall half a kilometer from our house and even today, it is there. Opposite to my house lived a politician who then was the member of the legislative assembly. He also was leftist a trade union leader.

On the way to my school lived two (or three?) ministers. That means, it is the official residence of ministers. Then the city police commissioner’s office. Police training college also was very near. Then this building called ‘Residency’, with vast compound. This is called so because, when the British were ruling this place, their resident representative, a British citizen, lived here. We used to wander inside this place and throw stones at the mango trees (to get mangoes). And for some kids, this served as a safe place to hide when they bunk class.

There were ice stick venders outside the gate of our school. Though teachers ask the students to not to buy them, we always bought them. They came in different colors and flavors. The most popular type had sort of ‘pasta’ in it. These weren’t of high quality and I hardly think that they were made at hygienic conditions. But still we bought them very frequently, some even daily. There was a small shop near our school’s front entrance where we get nice jaggery-coconut candies. They were very tasty.

Another ‘establishment’ one can never forget is a small restaurant opposite to the back entrance of our school. We students used to have our lunch from there if we could not bring lunch box. None of us ordered a regular meal, though we were there to have lunch, but its most popular ‘item’ was ‘dosa’ which weren’t like home-made ones. It looked like pan cake and tasted differently. The curry supplied along with it was ‘sambar’. Then in a tray comes snacks like ‘vada’, ‘modakam’ etc…my favorite was ‘modakam’. Most of us preferred having food from this restaurant than brining from home. But what if the parents think the other way? Huh !


Dosa in that restaurant looked like this


Sambar



Dosa


Vada made of black gram



Vada made of bengal gram

We mostly played ‘konnikkali’ a ‘limping-game’ where we draw a court and using one leg to jump/leap, we need to touch the others inside the court. If that person accidentally touches his other leg on the ground, he is out. And next member from his team continues the game. Otherwise we played cricket. There weren’t any cricket ball, no bat, no stumps !!! We will make a ball using paper (or sometimes used rubber ball), use some flat piece of wood as bat and some sticks or our school trunk as wicket. Sometimes we play even hide and seek or ‘seven tiles’

I wasn’t doing great at studies, I never aggregated above 80%, but since there weren’t much competition, I always stood within the top 10 of our class, where we had about 40 students (then moved on to top 3)….I wasn’t self motivated. There weren’t any encouragement from either the teachers or parents, so I did not participate in any of the other-than-study competitions, though I could have achieved something.

At home, only change that happened was, the house owner’s wife gave birth to a baby boy (later on, one more……I met them recently, I could not identify them, one of them became a CA – like CPA)….cat died and new cat came. Then some minor quarrels between my mother and the house owner’s wife. Once I even heard about my dad’s plan to leave us and live alone, which I think was just a bluff to threaten his wife.

But again, as the four members sit together as a family, without any doubt, it wasn’t a happy family.

I entered into puberty……

I developed the habit of writing diary/journal.

Once again I passed the final exam with first class. Now time to move on to high school.

I am In Fifth Grade

We moved into a new place. For a change, it wasn’t a rented house, but a leased one, for five years. Thus for the next five years, I lived in a single house. From fifth grade till 9th grade.

But we were sharing the house with the house owner. There was a common veranda. In the left there was a room and that was for the owner. Then a hall and to the left a bed room and that was for us. The hall leads to another ‘area’ which had a room in the left side (for the owner) and a kitchen in the right side (for us). This ‘area’ was for the owner but we can’t go to our kitchen without using it. So, though it wasn’t a common area, it was a ‘walking’ area for us. The terrace was common.

With this setup, there weren’t any privacy. Most of the time, the owner and their people walked thru our hall, if we kept the door open. I did not like this place. But as a kid, there weren’t any choice.

This house had a small story. The land surrounding this house is very vast. It had three compound wall and the back was open to the land, but with some small foundation like stones. The area belonged to a rich man, who also was a top bureaucrat. My owner served this family for long. So, the rich man gave a small part of his land for free. Not only that, he pushed him into a government job using his hold. My owner then built a house in that land. He had a wife and when she died of some reason, he married her younger sister. When I started living there, that lady was pregnant.

Their family had 4 members. House owner, his wife, wife’s mother and eldest sister.

We were not supposed trespass the surrounding land. But it looked like a small forest. It had many trees, like a small Tamarind tree, Jack fruit tree, Plum tree, Papaya etc. And there also were trees which in Malayalam is called ‘Manjadi’. Still I don’t know its English name. It is a tree but had its fruit look like a pea. And the seeds are blood red. We used to use these seeds for playing.

The owner had a dog. Or better I say we had a dog coz, many a times, we used to feed him. This is the first dog that lived with me or my house. This dog never had any particular place to sleep and it slept here and there. Most of the time, the dog was untied and it used to wander around in the ‘forest’ area. When we became friends, he used to accompany me, half the way till my school. Some students stoned him and may be that is one of the reasons he followed me only half the way.

This dog was brown in color and was very playful. It really played ‘catch me if you can’ with me. If I run he will try to catch me and when I am caught, he will either jump over me or bite me without hurting !!!

Then, one day, my dad brought one kitten. He too loved cats just like me. This dog tried to catch the cat so many times. But finally, it gave up its enemity. I trained this cat to do his ‘potty’ keeping a tray of sand. Coz, we used to keep the cat inside during night, locked. He used to return at night wherever he was.

I wasn’t aware of Pavlov and his experiments. But a similar thing happened with my cat. This cat had a small milk bowl. Sometimes, there will be ants in it. So before pouring milk, I used to tap it to remove the ants or dust. And then, whenever we tap that bowl, the cat used to come running. This is the case if we just happened to drop the bowl or kick the bowl accidentally….he will come running and then demand for milk.

My school was about 20 minutes of walk from this house. Sister’s school also was at somewhat similar distance. Mine was a Boy’s school and hers was a Girl’s school. We did not have a proper neighbor as such. Later on, a family living in one of the opposite houses became friendly, when one of the girls there became a friend of my sister. I have never been there, though.

In a house just opposite to my house lived a politician. He was a Trade Union leader and a member of the State Assembly. His both sons studied in my school (my seniors). One of them was into active politics and became a Member of the Parliament.

My school was a breeding place for politics. Most of the students were inclined to one of the political parties. Two of my cousins were also in this school and the eldest was into active politics and became School Chairman at some point of time (and then became a ‘Corporator’ – member of a Municipal Council). He was a leftist and I turned into a Rightist (then to a centrist).

Since my school admission was done at the time of closing the admission, I was assigned to a division called ‘I’ (A to H was full) and the funny thing is that the division I did not have a class room. And our class teacher what a Craft teacher!. He sits in the Craft room and we pple were divided into small groups and put into other divisions. Thus I became part of the A division. But the Proper A division students considered us as some second citizens, at least in the beginning and there was a wrong belief that we are not good at studies and hence we got the last admission. Thus even getting a seat to sit in the bench was a small issue at the start.

I had to wait till my first term exam to prove that ‘I’ does not stand for Idiots. I was well ahead of most of the A division students. But I failed in English and ‘A’ division class teacher (who used to teach English) even insulted me in front of the class by means of some comments.

For the next term exam, I scored very good marks in English and my teacher commented in front of the whole class that ‘He copied it from somebody else’. I felt humiliated and insulted.

I did not like that teacher. He was a stubb looking unfriendly man. Ours was a government school and the uniform norm was only white shirt and black trousers. We can wear any kind of foot wear, no neck tie required. And this particular teacher asked us to wear a tie and we looked odd in the entire school. I don’t know who intervened; he finally dropped the idea after a few months. When there were student strikes (which was the national festival for this school and we kids actively participated in most of the student protests, shouting slogans.) he asked us to hide somewhere and once those protesters are gone, come back to class. But we passed this info to our seniors and they ‘taught him some lessons’ (some even damaged our class room!!!!). I did not like him at all.

There were so many poor students in this school. Many of them came to school without lunch. The government used to provide some food. But there existed a parallel system here. Issuing food packets. And this responsibility went to that class who were on ‘duty’

It was called ‘Class On Duty’. The school management will put up which class is on duty for a week, on the notice board. And it is the responsibility of that class to look at the overall cleanliness of the school etc. And some students from that class takes initiative and goes to other classes and gets a list of students who are willing to bring one extra lunch packet. And next day thy go to that classes and collect the food packet and keeps them in the Craft Room. The poor students can go and get a packet ( a typical a food packet is usually rice and some curry packed in plantain leaf and then wrapped using news paper)

I still remember the name two three students from my fifth grade. One is Arun T.G, who was very good at studies and a very good orator. He got many prizes in elocution. And he was a well behaved student with a smiling and pleasing face. Then Hari Prasad, who became my friend and remained as a friend till P.U.C (12th grade). I don’t have any other special memory about my 5th grade. No need to talk about the atmosphere in the house. There weren’t any change. And I did not see any change approaching me even at the end of the horizon. ….

Festivals

I don’t know the reason but we shifted from that house to another. And here I finished my 4th grade and that was the last class available in that school. So, that means I need to go to another school from next year onwards. I finished my 4th grade with first class but the last word from my teacher wasn’t ‘best wishes’ but she told my mom that there is no place left in my body to be beaten by her. She was a ‘terror’ – Radhamani teacher.

Once she had asked the class what we want to become when we grow up. Many students said ‘police’ , ‘driver’ , ‘conductor’ (a person who issues tickets in transport bus) etc and I don’t remember what I said. Or may be she did not ask me.....

My dad did not show any interest in admitting me to any school and finally mom took me to a nearby school which had very bad reputation. Some of our relatives and mom’s one of the colleagues (who was close to our family) advised her that she is spoiling my future since I was good at studies.

Govt.Model High School

Thus before attending even once day, I joined another school. This was a government school, known mainly for student protests and strikes!. But it also had a reputation.

I did not have any friends in my neighborhood. This was mainly because I had five cousins with me (out of 27) and four of them used to play with me and my sis. The eldest was a kind of rowdy that time and used to beat his younger siblings. So, I wasn’t that friendly with him during my childhood.

Diwali was one of our favorite festivals, apart from the most popular Onam (during August-September). It was during Diwali we burst fire crackers and most of the time I used to get some burn (by experimenting new things) which I hid from my dad.

Onam days were grand. 10 days of holiday. Four days of feast (Sadhya) with different sweets. Usually some of our relative might invite us to have feast with them during the third or fourth day. Thus it will be different set of dishes. Though the curries would be same by name, taste will be different. The feast would consist of minimum of three pickles (ginger, lemon and mango), one mixed vegetable curry called ‘Aviyal’, one or two fried vegetables called ‘thoran’ (like cabbage, beans, bitter gourd etc), then this pachadi, kichadi, banana chips(vattal), banana chip coated with jaggery (uppery), then papad (another thin and round fried item) and many more, all these are side dishes and there will be some main curry which we pour and mix with rice. They are parippu, sambar, rasam, pulissery, mor (spiced buttermilk).

The major item is the sweet served at the end (but one). One day it would be Vermicelli (called semya, a kind of pasta stuff) payasam. Then kadala payasm, palada payasam, pradhaman, jackfruit payasam, etc. Onam feast is a traditional vegetarian feast, all over our state, Kerala

Onam is play time too. We get new cloths, new ball to play, we fly kites…..Dad’s eldest brother used to sponsor the swing, always. My dad used to make kites. And most of the time he accompanied us with glue and paper just in case to repair the kites. Those days were real fun. What is the idea behind Onam? It’s allover there in the net. One way, its a harvest festival.

Floral decoration (Attha Poo or Pookkalam) is another thing that happens during Onam, done in the morning.




We do this for 10 days (all over the state, it starts and ends on the same day). We need to pluck the flower/buds in the evening itself else others will 'steal' it. Elders used to present others a small 'yellow' cloth. And for me, it was my dad who used to give.

Lots of many other activities happen during onam in our state, other than this; especially in the rural areas. Like, boat race (Vallam Kali), Thiruvathira kali ( a traditional dance form of kerala ) etc.

Thiruvathira Kali

Vallam Kali (Boat Game/race)

For us, the city people, there was this 'procession' where many agencies participate (major government departments, schools, florists etc) on 4th onam day. People take place on both sides of the road and watch. This travels about 5 kilometers.

Another major festival we eagerly used to wait is the Vishu, during April..

Kanikonna Tree During April


Two things are part of this festival. One the ‘Vishu Kani’. Here, we keep lots of fruits and vegetables (mango, usually as a bunch is a must then cucumber, jack fruit etc etc) , flowers (Yellow one calle Kani Konna is a must), ornaments (which symbolically represents the prosperity) etc and there will be pictures/idols of God Vishnu (in the form of Guruvayurappan or Krishna) at the centre. We will lit a lamp in the morning. This is usually done by elder women member of the family. What we have to do is see this first thing in the morning. When we wake up, we need to cover our eyes and come to the place where (usually the pooja room) this Kani is placed. Kids are usually wakened up by moms and they will cover the kids eyes with their palms.

Vishu Kani

But for us, the interesting part is the second aspect of it. The ‘Vishu Kaineettam’ That is, elders (or to be precise the family head) have to give some money (usually coins) to the younger members of the family. Thus I used to get some money from my dad, mom, some uncles, aunties etc. This is not a silly thing and sometimes, we get a decent saving. But I used to spent the money by buying ice cream, toys, comic etc.

Karthika was another festival we used to celebrate. During this day, we lit small oil lamps and keep it on our compound wall, entrance of our house etc.

A typical Karthika lamp

During Christmas, I used to buy Christmas greeting cards. Either I gave it to one or two cousins or I kept it with me!

I think that was the time Autorickshaws started plying on the road.

'Auto'

I told my parents I want to travel in that. But it took long time and finally, one day I traveled in it and felt like I am a prince. Those days, the bus fare started at 10 paise (and today, 10 paise coin itself is not there due to inflation – 100 paise = 1 Rupee). Those days, even one paisa had a value. We could buy two peanut candy with one paisa.

My family never had any pleasure trips or picnics. I did not have good relations with any of my relatives except those 4 cousins, during my childhood. When I grew up, one or two got added up, that’s all. Otherwise, I grew up in a kind of lonely environment and may be coz of that, I like my company. I was comfortable in the solitude in multitude coz, inside my mind, it was multitude in solitude.

Neighborhood etc

At home, I used to wear a Khaki half trouser. I did not get good cloths to wear during these periods This Khaki cloth was coming from the Government Transport Department where my uncle was working. Apart from the school uniform, I used to get one pair of color cloths per year, during Onam festival; and sometimes, when dad gets some additional money by surrendering his unused leave. Dad was extremely healthy (I don’t remember him taking bed rest not even a single time, except for surgery (like cataract). He never used to get fever or even cold, one reason could be that he practiced yoga for about 10-15 years ) and hence he always had some unused leave.

I don’t remember ‘celebrating’ any or my birthday except the one I mentioned, but I remember mother preparing ‘payasam’ (a sweet) during most of my birthdays’.

The in and around places near me were, Sasthamangalam, Vellayambalam, Kowdiar and Vazhuthacaud etc. My school was about 3 kilometers away from my house and we (me sis, cousins) used to walk to and fro. On the way there was a Temple called ‘Althara’ and near that there was house which had a gooseberry tree. We used to sneak in to the compound and get the berries.

There were two palaces in our neighborhood. One at Kowdiar and another at Kanaka Kunnu. During Onam festival, all these area would be illuminated and the Kanaka kunnu palace looked stunning. Family members of the Travancore dynasty still live in Kowdiar palace.

One of the main attractions of this city (Trivandrum) was the presence of Red colored Double Decker bus (just like the one seen in London). I think this started plying on the roads during the British rule. There were only two or three routes for the Decker and ours was one (Sasthamangalam). I liked traveling in that bus sitting ‘up’. That too catching a window seat.

When I grew up, I read in the news paper that ours was one of the cleanest cities in the world that time (my childhood days, the beginning of 70s), though it was a very small city. We used to drink water directly from the tap and we did not catch any waterborne disease. For wounds, we never used to go to any doc to dress it but used to squeeze out the drops from a plant called ‘poochedi’ in Malayalam and apply it. There were two types. This stuff worked really well. I might have wounded a hundred times (a lil exaggerated?) and it never became septic. The famous doc of our locality was Dr.Keshavan Nair and we all had very high respect for him. He worked in a hospital called ‘Sri Ramakrishna Mission Charitable Hospital’. But it was popularly known as the ‘Sasthamangalam Hospital’

I developed cavities in my tooth and my parents did not care. Thus I could not eat some food items and others in my family ate. I remember me crushing the peanuts to powder and having them. Since we play without wearing any shoe, I used to get lots of wounds. Main culprit was broken glass pieces and thorns. These things were plenty in our school ground. I hid my wounds from my dad else he would beat me.

I remember one walking experience during these periods. Dad took us to the beach. There was a temple also. Unfortunately there was huge rush in the bus and dad said we will walk and he kept walking and we followed. I was about 8-9 years old and we walked about 8-10 kilo meters.

As I mentioned, quarrel between dad and mom was a definite thing during salary day. Mom used to pay her ‘share’ to that uncle, though dad asked her not to do so. Then mom started borrowing money to adjust this. Thus she created some private debts without father knowing. She did some extravaganza by spending money in restaurants. And this was something good for us since either we were part of it or she brought parcels for us, excluding dad. I gave him a share of it once (banana fry) and he shouted at mom for wasting money and thus we stopped giving him any share. Mom spent lot of money for eatables and then paid off at a bakery and grocers shop; those purchases were made by that uncle and mom’s sister and not by us. Dad spent some part of his money in lotteries (The main reason was he won a decent amount before marriage and put that money in some private bank which then declared bankrupt). The ultimate result was there weren’t any saving and we moved from one rented house to another.

At this stage, dad’s eldest brother took some initiative and arranged some money and we finally bought a piece of land, built a small house and started living there. One of my neighbors was a drunkard and rowdy. Almost all days there were quarrel and shouting. That huge guy used to beat his wife and she cried loudly. Sometimes he used to take a dagger and threatened to kill her. We can hear all these shouting. If what we had inside the house was fire (quarrel) outside it was forest fire. I was very scared of that man, who always had red eyes. I used to run away when I spot him.

Thus I lived in total fear. My dad hated this place and thus we came back to my uncle’s another house as tenants, for a short time till that own house got disposed. Then moved to another rented house.

Here we were living in a portion along with house owner. Nothing scary here. But I had some minor fights with house owner’s son (committed suicide last year, due to some financial liabilities). Some kids stuff. His sisters were nice to me and the youngest one became a small time movie actress.

My dad had some money with him since he sold that house for a profit. Another uncle of ours (died a couple of months ago) borrowed a part of it and he then hesitated to return. Dad got a part of it in installments, and this process took many years. He invested the remaining money in some land, which had coconut cultivation. This we bought from one of my aunt’s relatives. Thus I accompanied that aunt (sometimes with sister or mom) when she goes there to pluck coconuts from her property, thus we can pluck coconuts from our property. That was interesting journey. There we used to visit aunt's some of the relatives too.

There were paddy fields, coconut cultivation, small ponds, streams, pine apple, mango trees, rocks, tapioca, hen, cattle etc...

BLOOD SPORT

I went to another school (Sisu Vihar) next year and we moved into a rented house, which was a portion of my dad’s younger brother’s house. Quarrel between my dad and mom became more and more often. Sometimes (at night) mom used to leave the house (usually she proceeds to our old house (uncle’s) which was about 300 feet away) and it was my job running after her, crying, pleading her not to go and bringing her back to home. I have never seen my father beating my mom. He never abused her too. (My parents never used any bad words and once I got beaten to pulp for calling my sister a swear word, though I did not know what it meant).

(Dad was a non-smoker and teetotaler, but he used to chew betel leaf, that too very often. Or I better say he was addicted to it.

Betel Leaves

He did not use much tobacco along with it. Mostly only three things – betel leaf, betel nut and lime paste which is calcium carbonate. There was a dedicated plate for this purpose, which was used to keep all the ingredients in small quantities. There was a special cutter

Nut Cutter


for cutting betel nuts, in Malayalam, this is called ‘Pakku Vetti’ (pakku means betel nut and vetti means tool used for cutting)).

Thus my family atmosphere was morose. This was the situation till I became 17 years old. Life was under fear, insecurity, uncertainty and turmoil.

Overall, dad became more ferocious. He lived in his own world. He hardly talked to mom. I don’t remember him taking me to any movie. He wasn’t mild even to me and my sister. So I was always after my mom. She bought me almost everything she could. Books, pen, pencil, torch, toys. Chocolate…… Dad too used to buy one story book per month and he bought me ice cream whenever I came with a decent report card, which was the usual thing for me. But I did fail in math once or twice. Then he won’t sign the report card and I have to beg and apologize. But those moments were rare. There weren’t anybody to take care of our studies at home. Nobody asked me to study. There weren’t anybody to help me doing my home work (except my sister, sometimes, that too after cribbing!).

It was my job to wash my clothes. In my family everyone washed their clothes by themselves, including dad. We had separate plates for each member. That too we washed ourselves. I think this is hygienic but can stand in between developing sharing mentality in kids and induces ‘I’ and ‘My’ feeling. But if both parents are working and there is no servant, we need to adjust.

I was a timid boy. I got teased and troubled by even the girls of my class, in the new School. I cried. How long can I cry? Then I had a fight with another boy, for some reason, when I lost all my control. That was a turning point, though we both got beatings from our teacher. Then I started reacting to those who dared to trouble me. I proved to be good at fighting. I even fought with 2-3 kids of my size at the same time. Slowly I got the rowdy title. I never started a fight. Many times my class teacher asked me to bring my parents. But they did not turn up. More beatings, more standing out (of the class), more crying, more standing in front of the class with hands up, more standing in the class with books on head!!!!!

One aunty (my mom’s elder sister who was working in another school) came handy in these circumstances. She came to my school representing my parents.

There were small gangs headed by somebody and I too had one. Usually, members under us would be those who got beaten by us at some point of time. I had a right hand man who always stood with me and when grew up, became a Soldier. Even after 30 years, we are friends. After a BIG fight with another class (division), I got shifted to my enemy class as punishment. I cried a lot and begged my class teacher to put me back to my ‘home’ division.

Finally she agreed on one condition. I need to go to the Head Mistress and get her permission since it was her decision to change my division. Happily I went to her room and she forgave me. And my right hand man moved a little and gave me a place to sit. We both smiled at each other. That Head Mistress was one of the popular figures in the Teacher Community, those days – Mariyamma Teacher.

There was a beautiful girl (Lini) in our school whose presence made many of us a little bashful.

AN UNEXPECTED HOLIDAY

My dad was a ‘pooja’ (Worshiping the God by lighting lamp, offering prayer, flowers, chanting mantras etc) oriented man. He was very punctual about it. I remember him spending long time in his ‘pooja’ room (in India, people used to keep a dedicated room for worship and keeps it very neat and clean and calls it a pooja room. (One can hardly see this in modern middle-class Indian homes; it is becoming just a pooja cupboard…the rich still have this choice). He might skip a meal or two but not his pooja. I don’t know what kind of prayer he was saying or what ‘mantra’ he used. But anyway, he was ‘crazy’ about his pooja.

There was one maternal uncle I ‘hated’, that time. A horrible man. He used to scold me. I thought ‘when I grow up, I will beat him’. This guy was the prominent figure in my mother’s family. Mom’s parents died early and she was brought up by some of her relatives. I don’t remember how this uncle is related to me (while writing this). My mom used to call him uncle and we called him ‘big uncle’ (valyammavan, in Malayalam- valya means big and ammavan means uncle).

‘Mom’s house’ memory is like this. There was her elder sister and her 5 children (my cousins), then this uncle. All of those cousins were married except two. One got married later and other remained unmarried (and died a couple of years back). I and my cousins had huge age gap since mom’s marriage was a late marriage. One of those cousins even had a son of my age. This big uncle was very fond of one of those cousin’s kids and never treated me and my sis well. Sometimes he even treated us like servants. Mom did not raise any voice. Not just mom, nobody in that house raised any voice against him.

My mom used to part her salary with this uncle (and her elder sister’s family too). May be coz, it was he who brought her up, at some point of time, though his character does not match with such a benign act. But later on, this became the main issue in my family. The usual happy day, the salary day, thus provided disquietude.

The story tells that this uncle requested my mom to vacate our rented house and live with them (now the rent too would come to him). Dad asked for a dedicated pooja room and he agreed to that. We moved. But that uncle cheated my parents. We even did not get a separate room to sleep. This ended up in a sort of altercation and my dad’s elder brother also got involved.

But the issue here was my father was a very soft type. He never quarrels with others. A solid believer in God. Never troubles others but helps them if possible. All he wanted was a pooja room and he did not even get a proper pooja place. There weren’t anybody in that house to support him, not even his own wife. This led him to a nervous breakdown. He could not even sleep. And finally, his eldest brother took him to a doc, who prescribed sleeping pills.

My dad had nobody to open his mind/heart. His own wife wasn’t a support to him. She did not understand him. And may be he also did not understand her. Since the root cause is my mom (through which this uncle came to our life), may be my dad developed a dislike in her. There stated a gap and may be each other’s imprudent acts widened it. Minor tremours kept on happening in their married life/our life, and started the quarrel days, till I came of age.

If dad is with me now, I could have told him where and what went wrong with him, what went wrong with his belief in God, what went wrong with his poojas. But he is not anymore. This is a great lesson for everyone who is in the path of worshiping God. And I am thankful to my dad for that great lesson.

NEVER ‘FEAR’ GOD. HE WILL NOT PUNISH YOU. HE IS YOUR FRIEND AND NOT FOE. HE LOVES YOU. GOD IS NOT THAT IMAGE OR IDOL; HE IS BEYOND THAT. HE IS NOT THERE TO TEST YOU. A SCHOOL TEACHER GIVES A TEST TO GET AN IDEA TO WHAT EXTEND THE STUDENT UNDERSTOOD. WITH GOD, HE KNOWS OUR LIMITATIONS AND CAPABILITIES. HE DOESN’T HAVE TO PUT A TEST FOR THAT PURPOSE. IF HE HAS TO, THEN HE IS NOT WORTH CALLING GOD…..

I became 5 years. My nursery was over and I was supposed to go to 1st standard/grade. But nobody cared for it. Thus I was left out with another uncle, my dad’s eldest brother. I liked him. He was a nice guy. His wife, my aunt too was very nice. And my family started living with them. Parents went for work and sister attended her class and I was left out in the house, for one whole year. Thus I lost one academic year and my class mates moved ahead of me. I did not do any study during this period but forced my sis to read out stories to me which she did not like. But I achieved this by complaining to my mom, uncle aunty etc.

I don’t clearly remember how I spent that one year. I used to eagerly wait for my mom to come back, that I still remember. My one set of cousins (dad’s younger brother's 5 children) used to come to that house, after school. Then my sister. We played. My uncle had farms and coconut grooves. I remember him taking me with him for plucking coconut. I enjoyed that coz, we traveled in his car and that was a privilege I got over my sister or other cousins. He used get me tender coconut and I loved it. He had 3 children but those cousins were very elder to me.

The Zoo is not that far from our place, it was just 3 Km away by road, which was walkable even for me. Those days, the sound pollution was less mainly coz of fewer vehicles. Thus I could hear the lions roar mostly during evenings.

Uncle had a dog. I played with him. One day there came a puppy and this dog chased it. I got angry and decided to kill the dog and gave him some seed that I thought would be poisonous. The dog did not eat and I forced it and the result was a serious bite. My dad was present on that day and he came running to beat me and not to help me, though the wound was deep and I was bleeding. My aunty and her servant came to rescue me from dad and they did some home treatment. Keeping a well heated coconut husk over the wound was part of it and that was horrible. Hoooo hooo… Nobody took me to any doc; nor did any doc came to me! The bite mark stayed there for more than 10 years.

That doesn’t mean that I did not like animals. I loved/love them. After that incident, we became friends again. And Later on, when we came as a tenant in that uncle’s one of the houses, this dog used to accompany me till our house. He was capable of giving us ‘shake hand’….Dear dog, I miss you!!!

There were some other dogs in our surroundings. Some used to quarrel with our dog. And I used to stone them. Thus one dog considered me as his enemy. He chased me a couple of times.

The strangest thing I remember during the stay in this house is a duck attacking me. Uncle had about 5-6 ducks and one among them declared war on me. It always chased me and tried to bite me. And I threw stones at it. No idea how this enemity started. To be precise, I don’t remember whether I started it first by stoning the duck or not. But in that case, I don’t see any motive in me doing so.

That house was surrounded by ample land and it had many things of interest. There was a well. There were mango trees, jack fruit trees, tapioca, chilly, guava, tamarind, rose, jasmine and many other flowers and plants (I don’t know their names in English). Then this ducks, hens and a dog. There weren’t any 'own' cats, but some cats used to come when my aunty cut fish. I remember one yellow and sort-of-white striped cat. Behind the compound wall there was a bushy area and I was told that there were Foxes. The uninvited guest who visited very frequently was yellow colored huge rat snakes.

Next year I too joined my mom’s school (Barton Hill Primary School). I studied in Malayalam medium. The usual trend was, kids from upper middle class (sometimes even from middle class, but not poor) used to study in English medium. That too those who study well. But if you are rich, even if you are not good at studies, you study in English medium. In my case, I was good at studies and my parents could afford it (the irony is there weren’t any additional expense since I studied in a government school). But still I studied in Malayalam medium. Among my relatives, in my generation, only one person studied in English medium, and that is my dad’s youngest brother’s eldest son.. I wished to study in English medium.

Sometimes we won’t get bus and we walked 5 km to reach the school (at the age of 6). I did not have any footwear, most of the time; if I lose one, it took long time to get a new one!. And many a times this ended up in my feet hitting some stones and getting wounded accidentally, coz mom used to drag me. Since she was a teacher, she had to be there in time. But most of the time, we reached there after the first bell !!! I had the ‘teacher’s son’ immunity so, most of the time I did not get any punishment for coming late, but sometimes I got.

I studied decently and I remember me coming out with a 10 out 10 in my slate

Slate


(a rectangle piece of baked clay, black in color and looked like a thick board, with a wooden frame, which was the main medium to write using a slate pencil; we used even Sea Urchin’s – pencil urchin-

Pencil Urchin


spikes as pencil) after one exam.

But this did not happen quite often, me scoring out of out.

Nursery

When I became about 4, I joined a nursery (Bala Vihar Nursery, it seems, not sure). I cried and cried and cried and finally my sister, who was my only friend and acquaintance, sat with me and thus she lost her one academic year!! Later on, we weren’t friendly and always used to quarrel with each other and was known as 'Snake and Mongoose'.

I remember my class teacher’s face, just coz I still have a group photo. I can’t recognize any or my class mates. My dad used to drop me and then mother picked me. While coming back, I was on foot. Those days, we the middle class kids were able to walk 2-3 kilo meters without any trouble. Only the rich had a motor bike or a car. My dad’s eldest brother had a car. Owing a car in the late sixties was a big thing in India.

My parents were working. Mother worked in school (music teacher) and father in the secretariat library, both were State Government employees. I have a vague picture of my 'then house' (rented) and me going to nursery sitting on the small seat of my dad’s bicycle. In that house we had some open space too. Dad had made a shady stuff by keeping some wooden poles and letting the bitter gourd to creep over it. It looked like a small shed. I remember some caterpillars moving around. We sat there and reposed.



Upma with Banana

Most of the day I carried ‘Upma’ as my lunch and hence kids used to tease me. Our brain is very productive in remembering bad things. Dad used to stop at some shop to buy banana which I was supposed to have along with Upma. Many a times he used to get even my snacks on the way. I don’t know why but I have a dull picture in my mind of that Anglo Indian lady who ran a bakery, from which we used to buy biscuits and all. I do remember that oval shaped biscuit which I have never seen in any other shops.

Once my foot accidentally went between the moving spokes and thus got sprained and wounded. As usual, dad repaired my foot!.

My dad (and his younger brother) was a vegetarian, by choice, and mom a non vegetarian. Mom ate non veg without dad knowing it, but me and sis had a clue. We cooked only vegetarian food at home. And Thus I too became a vegetarian. I got many opportunities to eat fish and meat but did not eat or better say could not eat. Presently, I and my sister are the only vegetarians in our family and relatives.

There came a war in 1971. Dad told me war is going on with Pakistan. But I did not understand much. I might have taken a stick or the small bow and arrow and enacted some fights. But it seemed my family also faced some financial probs during war. I saw somebody coming and taking the sewing machine. Parents might have sold it.

One birthday came during this period. Dad bought small polythene covers and filled it with different eatables like cashew nut, dry grapes etc and I distributed it in my nursery.

It looks like, we were a happy family, that time.

End of my nursery era.

I Am Three

It just happened one fine day and night. Technically it was day but it really was dark and the electric lights were a blessing. But still I was confused and that is what usually happens when you choose to come to this world at wee hours, like 2 am.

Born in Thiruvananthapuram or Trivandrum at a government hospital called ‘Kottakkakam hospital’. Kottakkakam means inside the fort. There were four forts built by the old Travancore Kings around this place.

Though I was the second child to my parents, I was the third. First child was a dead child. Story says, mom happened to see a snake in a window next to her, accidentally, and that shock and scare killed the unborn child.

I don’t remember anything till I became 2 and a half or may be 3. The only one thing I remember is a black and white memory of me sitting in a coffee plant/tree and one of my legs got struck between two branches. And it was said that there was a boy (whose name was Vijayan) to take care of me who ate most of my food and caught for giving me milk which had a dead fly and thus got sacked. But there are some incidents told to me by mom or other relatives.

One fine evening, I was lying in the cradle and somebody gave me a wooden scale (12 inches one) to play with. Naturally, I kept that in my mouth. There was a temple nearby and like many other temples, here also they had the offering of ‘bang!**’. There came a bang sound and I got frightened and that scale pierced into my throat and thus became a ’bloody’ incident.

(**I don’t know the exact word for this offering. It is like this. There is an iron cylindrical thing of about 5-6 inches long with a diameter of about 2 inches. There is a hole in the middle, where thy fill gun powder and top it up with some mud or brick powder. And a small hole somewhere in its body just a few centimeters from the bottom, used to put the wick. When they lit the wick, ‘BANG!!!’)

This happened when I was 1 or two. I don’t know whether this is the reason, but when I happened to see an ENT doc for a throat infection, when I became adult, he told me that my throat is not symmetrical. Then I narrated this story and he said he can’t comment on that but just informed me what he just observed (clever)

About the same age, I fell down from one of my aunt’s hands. She was a teenager then. Neither my head nor the floor got broken!!

We had a Pomeranian dog that used to lie down under my cradle when I was sleeping in the cradle. Thanks buddy!. I had seen his pic and it looks like I lost it. My dad took it with his own Kodak camera, which looked like a box!