Death Anniversary

Time flies very fast. Is that so? Will time change speed every now and then? Time and mind are connected. When we are happy or busy, we feel the time flew fast. When we are unhappy or bored, we feel it moving slowly.

Whatever be it, it was on this day, a year ago, my mom left her body. Is what is left my mom? Or was it the body that I cremated who was my mom? When we are here in this planet within a body, we feel emotions towards even the dead ones. I don’t know what it is like with the departed ones. I think in every religion, people do something for the departed soul on this day, at least a prayer.

The memories of my mother still lives in me. I read my own blog which was connected to this day, that I wrote a year ago. Apart from mom’s memories, one more thing had something to do with this day. A year ago, it was the presence (though not physical) of a friend of mine, today it was marked by the silence of the very same person. It wasn’t something good or I liked or I expected. I wished to share/tell something about my mom with her.. ..But I couldn’t. ..Did I forget to tell that I am always available? ALWAYS..

I better I remember something good about my mother than trying to think how good a mother she was or how good she was as wife or how good she was as a granny or how good she was as a mother-in-law. Who am I to comment on how good a wife she was? That should be done by my dad. But where is he? Are my mom and dad living together? Did they meet somewhere? When they were alive, he told my mother well in advance that he will pass away before her, though they were of the same age. And he did the same thing, though he had nothing to do with the heart failure; though he wasn't fully ready for it(he wished to see his daughter complete her masters). Did he wait for her or did he carry on?

My mom loved food. She used to visit restaurants more frequently than my dad, when she was working. Many a times, I was part of those visits, if not, she used to bring something for us. 'Us' means mostly me and my sister. Sometimes we avoided dad coz we were scared that he might scold for wasting money.

Hey dad, I know you cant read my blogs, but can you read my thoughts? If yes, I want to ask you one thing. If mom was wasting money, what about you? What was your savings? Why couldn’t you send your son to a medical collage to fulfill his dream?. No, am not angry with you, but I still I want to ask you that.

Yes, I was talking about mom and food. If we had some snacks at home, it always was coz of mom. When I say mom loved food, it doesn’t mean that dad did not. Dad was vegetarian and mom a non vegetarian, may be that is the difference. One tried to not to spent too much on restaurants and the other one didn’t bother about it. As a cook, mom was quite ok, though she wasn’t exceptionally good. She could cook most of the traditional dishes. As a cook, her sister flared well.

When I remember about mom, I can not forget one thing. May be it is the same with most of them who knew her. Her neatness. And she was very particular about having a neat bed. When she was with a cousin of mine, I visited her and her bed wasn’t that neat. It really pained me, though I did not comment on it.

Mom was very good at handling newborns. Giving them bath, giving them food, make them sleep, sing lulls for them… she liked it. I had seen one thing; many a times people from the neighborhood used to bring the babies to her to give them a bath.

One more thing I can not forget about mom is that it was she who kept in touch with all of our relatives. I don’t even know many of them!

I am not sure about the life after death. But mom, if you are continuing some journey, I wish you all the best !